Page 16 of Sin

11:30 a.m. Watched porn and masturbated

“Lily.” Ethan’s voice is probing.

“What?”

“You don’t need to write down every single thing you do.”

“But Noah said?—”

“Don’t give me that. You know why you wrote this down.”

The huskiness in his tone startles me. When I lift my gaze, his face is flushed. Oh wow. I really flustered him.

“Alright, fine,” I say. “I wanted to embarrass you.”

To my surprise, a faint smile tugs at his lips. “I’m not embarrassed. It’s a normal thing to do.”

A sudden jolt tingles through my body, and my mouth falls open. “Are you saying you watch porn and masturbate too?”

His face grows utterly still, and his throat works. “I try not to watch porn, because I’ve read that the industry is corrupt. But I do masturbate.”

I slap my hand over my mouth. “Oh my God, Ethan. You have no idea how happy this makes me. I really thought you were so religious and uptight you wouldn’t even masturbate. So if you don’t look at porn, what do you think about when you do it? I need porn because I’m a visual girlie. I like thrusting bodies and moans.”

He stares at me for a long moment, as if in indecision. Shit. I think his face is growing damp.

What a liar. He is embarrassed.

Still, I never thought he’d share something like this openly with me. The thought of Ethan with his hands moving up and down his cock with his face as flushed as it is now…

Fuck. I almost wish I hadn’t left that entry.

In a flash, the discomfort on his face vanishes. “You truly are Machiavellian. You know what you’re doing right now.”

“I told you I don’t even know what that word means.” I frown. “So no, I don’t know what I’m doing.”

He shakes his head. “It means you’re smart and strategic against your enemies, and you use their weaknesses to your advantage. You didn’t give me those graphic details because you have no filter. You did it because you know I don’t want to imagine you…”

His eyes widen minutely, and he scratches the back of his head. A charged silence follows, and the air grows thick as mud.

Holy shit. Was Ethan about to admit that he pictured me masturbating? The thought makes a delicious pressure build in my tummy.

I school my expression to look innocent. “Doesn’t want to imagine me what?”

He lifts a hand. “Stop. This conversation is over.”

“But you’re my coach. You need to spell things out for me when I don’t understand.”

He groans. “You’re the fucking worst, Lily Greenwood.”

Warmth rushes through my veins. My God, I haven’t had this much fun in months. How bizarre that it would be in the company of stick-up-his-ass Ethan Harrington.

Maybe I’ve misjudged him. At least a little.

A while later, Ethan looks up from my laptop. “I have to say, I’m impressed with your attention to detail. You logged every day to the minute.”

His tone is gentle but ever so slightly condescending. I grit my teeth. “You don’t need to praise me for something a ten-year-old could have done.”

“Did it help?”