Page 35 of Sugar

Juno sighed and nuzzled against the front of Piper’s chest. “I like that you want this too.”

They were both so rough around the edges in different ways, but he realized they fit. The future was still complicated, but for the first time since Piper decided he was in this, he had actual hope.

CHAPTER TEN

Sitting in the middle of his empty apartment, Juno looked around. Somehow, it seemed even smaller without all his stuff in it. Four walls, a door with the world’s smallest bathroom, a pathetic excuse for a kitchen, and a ceiling fan that never worked right, blinds that never went all the way up or down.

It was terrible.

But it was his. Or, well, it had been. Now, he was getting ready to leave the key in the lockbox and say goodbye to this part of his life. Moving wouldn’t have seemed like such a big thing if his eyes hadn’t gone all wrong and his business hadn’t started to slow so dramatically. At best, he’d be looking for a slightly larger unit.

Maybe one with better A/C and a full-sized stove.

Now, he was going on the road, and when he got back, he had no idea where he was going to go. He knew he’d have to talk to Piper eventually, but he had to face the reality that they might not like each other very much once they were done.

In that case, he’d have to call Oliver or Miles. Or both. He’d have to come clean maybe sooner than he was planning. And while he knew they’d be a little angry at him for keeping this to himself, they’d do everything in their power to help.

With a sigh, he glanced down at the pile of papers in his lap. One was his log-in info so he could check his DNA results. The others were the pamphlets he’d been given by his doctor. There was an acronym scribbled on the top page: LHON.

He couldn’t remember the full name. It was long, and scary, and sounded all Latin and official. Between him and his best friends, he was the dumb one. Where Oliver and Miles had been scholars, he’d just been a pretty face and a hard right hook whenever someone was mouthing off and cutting a little too close to the quick.

He wished he was smarter now. He could know what he was facing. He’d understand all those medical terms, and he’d at least comfort himself with how they all fit together to make sense.

Instead, he just had Google articles that all ended in suggestions on how to cope, and none of them were very helpful.

They all read like hey, asshole, you’re going blind, and life will suck. Deal with it.

He hadn’t yet found a webpage that told him how to deal with the hollow feeling in his gut at the thought of people staring. At using a cane in public and having everyone know this thing about him that made him vulnerable. That would never get better.

He swallowed heavily as he flipped over one of the brochures and stared at the number on the back. Call for your free white cane and two-hour orientation and mobility session. There was small print beneath that, all the caveats, he assumed, but he could barely read what was on the page in bold letters.

He stood up and tucked that into his pocket, along with his website code, then tossed the rest in the bag he was going to throw out on his way to the bus. His car was still in the parking lot, and he needed to deal with that too.

Another favor to drop on Piper’s shoulders, though he knew Piper didn’t mind. The man was hedging around those three little words that terrified Juno to his core. He was shit-scared of feeling it, but he was shit-scared of ignoring it because he damn well knew this was a good thing.

He just wanted Piper to see him at his worst. Not just snapping at him in the kitchen when his mood sank. He wanted Piper to be with him twenty-four seven. To see him sleep-deprived. To smell his morning breath. To hear him fart and smell the bathroom after a massive shit. To watch him pick at his teeth and pull out wedgies and bomb the room with his smelly-ass feet after a long hike.

He also wanted Piper to see him vulnerable. He wanted him to be around when his other eye started to go. He needed Piper to see that it was going to be hard. Juno was okay now, and he would be okay in the future, but in the process?

His reputation for being a troubled teen was going to come back and haunt him. He could feel it in his bones. A revisit to the time when he didn’t know how to deal with being weak. If Piper could handle that, then Juno would breathe a little easier.

But he knew he’d be destroyed if he let down his guard, allowed Piper to dig his claws in, only to be cut free when the man realized this wasn’t the life he thought it was going to be.

Juno considered canceling the date the entire bus ride back to Piper’s town house. He sat with his head pressed to the window, gazing out at the blurry scenery, his headphones blasting music into his ears. He knew he should probably cut that out. The last thing he needed was to fuck up his hearing with his sight going. He closed his right eye and felt a small surge of panic at how huge his blind spot was now. It obscured almost all of his vision save for a patchy ring of muted sight in the corners. He could see better out of the side of his eye than the bottom, but even when he turned his head, nothing looked right.

How was he supposed to go through life like that? The only thing that kept him from losing it was opening his right eye and letting things even out. He still felt off-kilter, but he could see.

For now.

He swallowed past a lump in his throat as he saw the 7-Eleven that was on the corner of Piper’s street, and he pushed the Stop button and held the bar as the bus slowed. He kept his head down as he exited, then trekked down the sidewalk until he was standing in Piper’s driveway.

The man himself was outside waiting for him, leaning his gorgeous ass against the hood of his car. He was wearing jeans and a polo, and he had his hands in his pockets, his eyes obscured by what were probably very expensive shades.

He was so goddamn gorgeous Juno’s mouth started to water. And then he smiled, and Juno suddenly felt like he was floating. The distance between them seemed to dissolve by magic, and the next thing he knew, he was being pulled close, pushed against the car, and kissed breathless.

“Hi,” Piper said when he came up for air.

Juno’s vision was foggy, but for once, it wasn’t his eye condition. He blinked until Piper’s face cleared up. “Hi.”

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