Page 90 of Cruel Steps

I couldn’t hold Hope accountable if I wasn’t willing to do the same.

My thoughts regarding Emerson were so jumbled. The lies and truths swirled together, creating a vortex. I wanted to hate Emerson for the things she’d written, regardless of whether they were deserved. Hope was my sister, and I didn’t like seeing her hurt. But it didn’t excuse her actions. She’d hurt Emerson for years. The extent of her bullying was mind blowing.

Fuck. I felt so torn between protecting my sister or Emerson.

Not that you deserve her.

No, I didn’t deserve her. I hadn’t treated her any better than Hope.

Grabbing shakes and burgers, I headed back to the hospital with my own guilt weighing on me. Once I had Hope sorted, I needed to find Emerson and apologize. I didn’t know where we went from here. Or if we could. I honestly wouldn’t blame her if she kneed me in the balls again. But at the least, I owed her an apology.

Nodding at the nurse sitting at the desk, I walked to Hope’s room, pausing when I got to the door. It had been left open a crack and voices floated out. Electricity zipped along my spine, and the hair on my arms rose, telling me who it was. Wildcat.

“I can’t believe you’re here,” Hope said.

“Believe me. It’s the last place I expected to be.” Emerson paused. “I know it’s not my fault you got hurt, but I am sorry.”

“Come on, it’s not like you haven’t thought about pushing me in front of a car before,” Hope challenged.

“Oh, I’ve thought about it. Plenty. But thinking about it and doing it are two different things. I’d never want you to lose dance, Hope. I might not like you, but I know how much you love it.”

“But I don’t love it,” Hope whispered.

“What?” Emerson gasped. “But… I don’t understand. If you don’t love dance, then why…”

“Did I bully you so much?”

“I mean, yeah.”

Hope sighed. “I’m a selfish bitch. I looked at your life and saw someone who had everything and didn’t appreciate it.”

“That’s not fair. My life hasn’t been easy just because we had money. And appreciation… how would you know what I appreciate? You haven’t been my friend for years. Just because I don’t want to flaunt or use it to make people like me doesn’t mean I don’t appreciate it.”

“Like I said, I’m selfish. You said you’re sorry. You can go now.”

“Wait, you told my dad you wanted to talk to me.”

“It’s… nothing. Drugs make me say weird things.”

“I don’t believe you, but I’m not going to beg you to tell me. There’s just one thing I don’t understand. Why leave me roses and notes? Especially that last one. Was it to remind me of Lex?”

The mention of a guy’s name made my blood boil, and I had to readjust the shakes so I didn’t spill them on the floor by squeezing them too hard.

“I never left you those things.”

“Yes, you did,” Emerson said. “Here.”

“That’s not from me. I barely had enough money to afford food. I wasn’t going to spend it on roses for you. No offense.”

“But if you didn’t…”

It was quiet for a while, and I almost pushed in the door.

“It’s him. Isn’t it?” Hope whispered.

“But I thought…” Emerson’s voice shook, and I caught a hint of fear in her voice.

Curiosity got the better of me, and I finally pushed open the door. They jumped apart, their faces stricken as they stared at me.