Page 53 of Fire

* * *

Micah

I’m exhausted when I pull into the driveway. More so than usual. Even the prospect of seeing Ivy can’t put any pep in my step. I need to talk to her about what happened at the school, but my brain might as well be spaghetti after a sleepless night. My body aches because of the work out. Do I have the energy for a conversation this important? Or worse, am I blowing it all out of proportion? Maybe Nell’s forgotten everything that happened yesterday. Maybe it wasn’t that big a deal in the first place.

When’s the right time to tell her I’m her father?

My boot hits the first step. My hand grips the rail. I hang my head.

That little girl deserves the best shot at life I can give her. Whatever I do now can make or break that shot.

I’ve never felt so much pressure in my life.

* * *

Ivy

“You told people at school that Micah gave us a house?”

“Yeah. And it got me to thinking. All of it. And I just started to wonder if Micah is my daddy.”

I fold my arms across my stomach. I don’t want to lie to her. But I don’t want to make the decision to tell her on my own. Outside, feet hit the steps, heavy, clumsy, almost like someone who’s been awake for the better part of a day. Keys rattle in the lock and relief softens the tension in my shoulders because if he’s here, he’ll have a say in how this goes.

“Please, Mama!” Nell cries as the door swings open. “Please tell me Micah’s my daddy. I really want him to be my daddy!”

* * *

Micah

I pause just inside the door as Nell begs Ivy to tell her I’m her daddy. That name, wrapped in her little voice, it twines around my heart and tightens my throat. My girls look to me, Nell filled with hope and Ivy with worry.

“Is it true?” Nell asks me, grinning. “Do you look like me because you’re my daddy?”

I glance at Ivy. She shrugs, chewing her bottom lip, like a mouse staring at the cat.

My eyes burn as I look to my daughter. I nod, my voice stuck behind a lump in my throat.

Nell stands. Takes one step toward me, her little brows furrowing, and suddenly my worst fears are coming true. She’s going to hate me for not being part of her life. She’s going to run to her room and slam the door and I’ve only been in her life for a few days and have already ruined it.

“I’m sorry—” I begin, but Nell runs to me, wrapping her little arms around my legs and squeezing tight.

I drop my hand on her head, her white gold hair like spun silk against my palm, and meet Ivy’s gaze. One hand covers her heart, the other her mouth. Tears glimmer in her eyes.

Nell looks up at me, her smile as bright as the sun. “I always knew my daddy was a superhero,” she says, and something shifts inside my heart, a lock turning, the tumblers clicking into place.

Ivy can’t move out. She can get a job and pay me rent if that’ll make her feel better, but after this? I can’t imagine being without my girls again.

CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

Micah

“I haven’t laughed that hard in a long time,” My mom says a few days later, wiping tears from her eyes before pushing her dinner plate out of the way to brace herself on the table. Encouraged, Nell goes off on another diatribe about the kids in her class, which sends Mom back into fits of laughter. Dad’s enthralled with his granddaughter and has been smiling the entire night, though I’ve caught him watching me with a familiar look in his eyes.

He's worried. Wondering if I’m going to fuck this up. I see it written all over his face. And I get that. I’m wondering the same thing. Once again, past me’s choices have caught up and delivered consequences present me wasn’t expecting.

“This has just been the best night in a long time,” Mom says, smoothing her blond hair, then tucking it behind her ears. It’s shorter now than when I was younger, but it suits her, as do the laugh lines that crinkle with her frequent smiles. “I’ve missed the energy of little kids. And goodness, I love my boys, but I did always want a girl.”

“And now you’ve got me!” Nell beams, pleased as punch. “But I kinda like boy things.”