Page 37 of Sweet Venom

Her phone buzzes in her pocket. She doesn't budge, intent on giving me her full attention, but I insist she check it. "It's probably Mason making sure you're doing his bidding."

She rolls her eyes at my comment before snapping, "It's funny that you think he doesn't know I'm sitting in your office as we speak. If he could strap a microphone to me, he would." Then, as she pulls out her phone, she flashes it at me. "It's Mace calling to FaceTime."

"Answer it, and we'll find out if there's a hidden microphone in the Louis Vuitton you’re toting.

"Haha, very funny," she quips before answering, "Yes, dear," in a tone meant to mock.

But he ignores her completely, instead choosing to address me. "Vivi, I'm sorry. I don't have time to talk. I'm walking into a meeting with the commissioners, but I saw that Charlie is still with you. I'm not sure what she's shared with you yet, but none of it matters. I know you're unhappy with me, and I understand that, but if you don't hear anything today, hear this. Ellis Lykos loves you. It rivals what I have for the woman sitting in your office now." There are some muffled voices in the background before he says, "I have to go; I'll talk to you later, baby."

As soon as the phone clicks off, Charlie's eyes widen, and her mouth drops open before she says, "Why didn't you tell me he said, ‘I love you?’ Vivian, that's a big deal."

"You're right it is, but he said it on the heels of a conversation he had with Mason where I now know he heard my pathetic story about my parents and the lack of love I had with my own father and—"

"Stop. You are the queen of deflection today," she says, holding her hand up. "I know exactly where you are going, and I can promise you he did not say those words to you out of pity, and I think if you dig deep, you'll see that for yourself. The way I understand it, Ellis went to Mason because he knew you were holding back, and he didn't want to lose you again. We both know Ellis is a man of few words. He doesn't do well with emotions, a little like someone else I know…" she pauses, calling me out with a wide-eyed glare before adding, "So I suggest you own your shit and let him love you. You can't possibly believe that he is anything like your lunatic father. He is a sick man, Vivian. I don't need to know about the horrors you endured. They are valid, but don't let them steal your future the way they did your past."

I drum my fingers on the desk as her words resonate in my heart. She's not wrong, and while I may have cut ties and walked away from my money, I'm still letting my scars direct my future. Pulling in a deep breath, I'm letting all the toxic hate that fueled my past collect for the last time, because I'm done having a weak heart. As my lungs deflate, I let it all go and say, "How much do I owe you for your time today, doc?"

She laughs as we shake off the heavy conversation, but not before pointing her finger at me and saying, "You better not break his heart, Vi. I love you, but that man deserves the best. I might have to hate you for a while if you do."

"Trust me," I say as I pick up my empty coffee cup and lazily start spinning the paper sleeve, "hurting Ellis is the last thing I ever want to do, but—"

A knock at the door interrupts our conversation, and Tate pops his head in. "Lunch in thirty minutes?"

I stare at him with a perplexed look as my anger slowly rises. Since when does he think he can barge into my office while I have guests and demand my time? But before my anger has a chance to hit full boil, Charlie's expression grabs my attention, and Tate dips out. Suddenly, I'm thankful for his unwelcomed interruption, because it reminded me that I have questions for Charlie.

"Spill it, Charlie. How do you know that man?"

She quirks a brow before asking, "Does Ellis know about him?"

Her question takes me by surprise for two reasons. First, I have yet to tell her that I have any type of relationship with Tatum, and secondly, what does Ellis's knowledge of him have to do with my original question? That's when I remember what kind of company she runs with her father Nico Serra, and how Ellis technically has access to it by default, being his adoptive son.

My stomach starts to churn as I answer, "Yes." Fuck, I wasn't expecting this type of roller coaster by accepting my feelings and acknowledging them out loud. It's as if my ups and downs are somehow now tied to the trust I put in that man. "What aren't you telling me, Charlie?"

Her eyes slightly narrow before she says, "I could ask you the same thing." She nods back toward the door before adding, "I saw that look. The two of you shared it not once but twice."

I just told her I had no plans of hurting Ellis, so I don't believe her question is an innuendo suggesting otherwise. No, Charlie knows my past. She's asking if Tate is more. I could brush it off because, at the end of the day, it's none of her business, and technically, Tate and I aren't anything, but I could really use a girlfriend right now, so I say, "Fine, I'll tell you mine, but Charlie, this is girl talk. No running to Mason because he's your husband telling him everything."

She nods in agreement eagerly as a big smile takes over her face, and she says, "Promise."

Then, pointing my finger at her, I add, "And you will tell me what you know about Tatum Carroway." She purses her lips, unhappy with my addendum, but I add, "You spill too, or there's no deal. Plus, I am your best friend, so it's an unwritten rule that you must tell me."

"Fine," she answers a little bitterly. However, I don't believe it's because she doesn't want to tell me. My gut tells me it's about whatever confidentiality clauses she might be breaking by talking.

I get straight to the point because there is no good place to start. "I let Tatum get me off with a dildo on top of my desk before fucking Ellis and Sebastian poolside at your dad's house."

Her mouth drops open before she brings her hand up to cover it. Charlie is not a prude by any means. I know her reaction isn't judgment but rather straight shock. She rubs her fingers over her lips before she says, "Sebastian, as in Ellis's brother? I mean, I don't want to assume."

"Fuck off. You know damn well what Sebastian I'm talking about. Now, give me your honest thoughts." I intentionally was straightforward in my delivery because I wanted her unfiltered opinion, not one she believes I wanted to hear based on my feelings. She knows Ellis and Sebastian better than I do, and it's safe to assume she also knows something about Tatum Carroway.

"My immediate thought is that's fucking hot." She points her finger at me and adds, "You said this is girl talk, so it better not get back to Mason. Ellis is built like a Greek god." Pausing, her cheeks heat, and I know she's probably thinking about her own run-in with him in the shower. She rolls her lips before saying, "And while Seb is a prickly motherfucker, it doesn't change the fact that he is striking. Hell, if anything, it makes him more attractive. The allure of wanting to tame him and bend him to your will. Now, Tatum is something different altogether. He has that bad boy image down pat, covered from head to toe in tattoos, but those damn lips with their perfect cupid bow all pouty and shit. That man has one setting: slow simmer."

I can't help but laugh out loud at her analysis, but while she nailed their looks, it wasn't lost on me that she didn't mention anything about the entire dynamic. But before I can call her out, she clears her throat and says, "Vivian, in all seriousness, I don't know what to make of all that. Concerning Ellis and Sebastian, neither of those men make moves that aren't calculated, and that gives me trepidation. Not where Ellis is concerned, because if he allowed that to happen, I have no doubt he put thought into it, but Sebastian is savage. I've never fully understood him, but I do believe under his hard exterior is a man capable of love. Just be careful, Vi. I'd hate to see any one of you get hurt." She lets out a heavy sigh before adding, "But aside from the heavy, are you fucking kidding me? When I grow up, I want to be you."

That makes me laugh. I've been so worried about what comes next that I haven’t fully embraced the now and allowed myself to enjoy what I have. "What I have at the moment makes monogamy more and more appealing. Playing with three dicks is fun. Managing them and their demanding personalities, not so much."

"Well, if anyone can bring three men to heel, it would be you, Vi."

Her words give me a reason to reflect. Is there truly a reality where I can have all three men? Charlie didn't say anything I don't already know regarding Sebastian or Ellis. In the time I've spent away from Sebastian since we left the Estate, I've come to similar conclusions about his heart. Sebastian may be drenched in rage, but it's a wall, a coping mechanism for whatever pain lurks beneath the surface, and that hurt calls to me. I've been drawn to him since he stepped into Ellis's condo a week after Ellis and I had met. There was something eerily familiar about him then and now, and I've hated him for it. His mere existence has made me doubt all that I feel for Ellis. But I know a lot of my ire is rooted in the fact that I see myself reflected in him. I am that same angry kid unable to let go of her resentment for a past she can't change. It's why I haven't been able to move past him. A part of me wants to save him because no one ever saved me.

---