Page 44 of Rivers and Roads

“We each have a burden,” I told him as he settled back down. Sleep finally started tugging at me, the darkness in the room looking even more black. “And it gets easier to bear as time goes on. Just like in the war.”

I didn’t have to remind him of the horrors we’d seen there. And it was different, of course. What happened to me during my capture was nothing like I had seen in battle, but it was no less a part of me—just like everything Orion had gone through was no less a part of him.

And we survived it. We would continue to survive it.

“I want to do something tomorrow,” Orion murmured, and I could hear his voice thick with sleep now. “Something…” He trailed off, and I thought I might have lost him, but then he spoke again. “Something normal.”

I laughed, because I wasn’t sure what that was anymore, but I held him a little tighter as I closed my eyes and sank into his grip. “Anything you want, my love.”

I felt a pulse of gratitude in the bond and then the peace as he fell asleep.

Something normal, it turned out, was a trip to town. I was hesitant to leave until he showed me the letter Kor had sent with him. I wasn’t entirely convinced that we hadn’t been followed, but so far, the cabin had remained undisturbed.

Orion and I both figured things had also gone to hell in a handbasket now that the data from ComTech had leaked. All parties had access to it, so all sides would be scrambling. There would be campaigns of denial, misinformation, the rebellion growing, and the opposition doing everything they could to retain their positions.

If the humans hadn’t already done it, they’d make a vie for power soon, and the Wolves would be forced to choose a side. It would be war again—only this time, the Wolves had the advantage. We were stronger, and although we hadn’t recovered entirely, every single one of our people was trained for battle in some way or another.

The humans had been falling in droves before the Equinox Treaty was presented to the globe, and there were human governments overseas that were more and more willing to negotiate peace with the Wolves.

It would be ugly, and it would be bloody, but most of that would be metaphorical.

I kept that in mind as I showered, and the promise of having fresh food and maybe a change of clothes that fit properly was enough to motivate my steps. Orion met me in the hall with a kiss, pushing me back against the bathroom door as he devoured my mouth.

“You’re making it hard to leave,” he murmured.

I laughed and nipped at his jaw. “You’re the one who wanted to go out, and you’re right. Supplies are getting low, and I don’t think I could take another night of your pasta.”

“Asshole,” he breathed, groping the front of my sweats that were tented with my erection. “You’d eat it and love it.”

“Well,” I said slowly, rocking against his hand with a soft moan, “I’d definitely eat it.”

He didn’t give me relief, and the frustration of his denial made me love him just a little bit more, especially when he looked at me with mischief in his eyes.

We hit the road in the little car he’d acquired, and it took me a while to adjust to the smell because it was still tinged with the compound. Orion noticed after a beat, and when he tried to pull over, I grabbed his arm. “Don’t,” I said, then rolled the window down. “It’ll pass.”

“I’m not going to make you suffer through this shit, Zane,” he argued, but he didn’t stop after that, and it was easy enough for me to reach between us and take his hand, pressing a kiss to the inside of his wrist.

He made a face, but I could feel the way his pulse sped up, and in the fading bond, there was a small push of affection. It was going to be agony when it faded entirely, but I was willing to let it go if I meant I could call him my own as soon as we were back behind the walls of Corland.

We reached the village after only a few miles, and I stared out the window at the quiet neighborhoods, the restaurants, and the little shopping centers. It seemed so…normal, so average. It was like a safe haven where war had never touched, and I couldn’t help but wonder what it must feel like to live somewhere violence hadn’t laid camp at your door.

Orion found a little strip of shops not far from the main road, and he pulled in, parking at the very edge. I knew why he did it—an easy get away, but I felt a small flicker of grief that we lived our lives like that. We couldn’t have a simple day out without looking for the exits first.

“We need clothes,” he said, reaching into the glove box. There was a small envelope inside, and my eyes widened when I realized it was full of cash. He caught my expression and laughed, leaning back as he counted it. “Kor was feeling generous.”

It felt almost like a trap. If it hadn’t come from Kor, I might have assumed we were being lulled into a false sense of security before they pounced, but I knew better. I closed my eyes and searched out the bond for my brother again, and I could still feel a quiet pulse of Danyal—alive, and currently cognizant.

I couldn’t imagine where he was, so I sent him as much comfort as my strength would allow, and I hoped Talia was doing the same.

“Zane?”

I glanced over and realized I’d zoned out. “Checking on Danyal.”

His cheeks flushed slightly. “I…I didn’t want to ask. It felt intrusive, but I figured if he was…if something had happened to him, you would have said.”

I bowed my head, then nodded. “I can’t get any details, but he’s aware of me, and probably aware of Talia. He’s calm, wherever he is. Which… honestly? That scares me the most.” I ached to be able to leave and find him—to throw myself into this fight, because it was one thing to take me, but him? I would have given my life to protect either of my siblings from the human madness.

“They’ve been exposed,” Orion said softly. “It’s likely they won’t put him through the same thing. No now. Not when the entire world’s looking.”

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