Page 18 of The Infinite Light of Dust

“We’re okay, right?” she asked, her eyes dropping a little in the mirror.

I nodded, still leaning against her. “Yes. We’re okay. We will figure all of this out together, so don’t you worry about me.

“Are you sure you want to come?” I asked her for the third time today.

Nodding, she assured me. “I’ll be fine. Phillip isn’t coming, and if he does, he will behave himself. I’m going to drive in case I want to leave early. Don’t worry.” She kissed my cheek and reached for the lip gloss pile on the top of my dresser.

Opening the top of one, she stepped closer and swiped the soft applicator across my lips. It was such an intimate thing to do, such a best friend thing to do. In the middle of all the things I could worry about happening tonight, instead I found myself grateful to have her in my life.

I rode with Elodie to Mendoza’s, where Kael and my brother were meeting us. Kael wanted to drive me, but it didn’t make sense to have him go out of the way and come off post to get me. He eventually agreed and asked me to text him when we were leaving so we could arrive at the same time. I could hear the roar of his truck bellowing in the distance as we pulled up. What meticulous timing on his end. Elodie’s entire demeanor changed when my brother stepped out of Kael’s truck, and Austin practically ran to the door to open it for her. Kael was a bit slower, but I waited to have him open the door for me, thinking about what it would be like if Elodie wasn’t pregnant and married and my brother could love her without complications, but of course life wasn’t fair like that.

Kael hugged me as if he hadn’t seen me in weeks, and I relaxed into the warmth of his body. He was wearing an oatmeal-colored cotton sweatshirt and matching joggers, stark-white sneakers as usual. My favorite type of outfit of his. He smelled so good, so clean and comforting.

“You look fucking adorable,” he told me, gently lifting the delicate moon-shaped necklace off my neck. His eyes traveled from the top of my wavy hair to the bottom of my loafers.

“Thank you.” I smiled up at him, hugging him again, wishing we were going to my house alone instead of to a crowded cookout, but I was happy to have time with him either way.

Both of us purposely avoided looking at my brother and Elodie as we made our way to Mendoza’s front door. Before we even knocked, Gloria opened the door and grabbed me into a hug.

“Karina! I’m so glad you came!” She squeezed me.

She smelled like a feminine floral perfume and shampoo. Her long black hair was as silky as ever, straight and parted in the middle, and she was dressed casually in a black crop top with long sleeves and low-rise jeans with wide legs. She always looked so effortlessly cool; her makeup was light, her skin glowing, and she didn’t look as exhausted as she usually did. That made me so happy. Things must be better with Mendoza.

“Everyone’s in the back. How have you been?” She wrapped her arm around me and looked back to wave at Kael, my brother, and Elodie.

“Good. Just, you know, there’s a lot going on.” I glanced back at the distance my brother and Elodie were putting between themselves, trying not to draw attention to the obvious.

“Yeah. I’d fucking say.” Gloria smiled but I couldn’t tell how she felt about the whole thing.

I knew she liked Austin and Elodie, but I wondered if she was judging them—rightfully so, but I wished no one would. She didn’t seem like the judgmental type at all, though, so I ignored my own paranoia.

“No one is going to bring up the picture,” she whispered to me, as if she could read my mind. “I’ve warned them all, and if they do, I’ll beat their ass.”

I had nearly forgotten that photo of them floating around, and we’d never figured out who’d sent it or why, or if Phillips had seen it yet, but I mentally crossed my fingers that everyone could keep their promise to Gloria and not say anything to my brother and Elodie tonight.

The pit in my stomach grew, and I couldn’t tell if my body was going to its usual anxious place or if it was trying to warn me. I would find out soon enough.

Chapter Twelve

Kael

Gloria had stolen Karina from me by sitting in the chair next to her and pulling the two seats close together, leaving no room for me. I was glad to see them bonding, so I wasn’t going to sulk, but the more people who showed up, the more I kept my eyes on Karina. She hadn’t moved from that chair since we’d gotten here about an hour ago, and she was on her third drink. Not that I was counting. I was still on my first beer, knowing I’d be driving and not knowing what the fuck the night would bring, so feeling that I needed to stay as alert as possible.

No one had pestered Fischer or Elodie yet, but there were more than a few glances their way when Fischer sat next to her and Toni. Noticeably, Fischer was drinking a Coke from the can instead of alcohol, and had declined Mendoza’s finest tequila.

“So, you’re out next week? What are you gonna do?” Mendoza asked me as we stared at our women, who were cracking up over something. Seeing Karina relax enough to laugh felt so good.

“I have no fucking clue. I thought I knew what I was going to do, I have that place in Atlanta, but I’m not sure what I want to do anymore.”

“I know damn well what you want to do, and involves that one.” He tipped the bottle of tequila in his hand toward Karina.

“She won’t go with me, and I can’t leave her here. But I already bought the house and will lose money on it if I sell it right away. For the first time, I don’t have a plan.”

“Why don’t you get married?”

I laughed at that, taking a swig of my beer. “Yeah, getting married will solve everything.”

“That’s the Army way.” He joined me in laughter and took a drink straight from the bottle. “Why won’t she come with you? If I were her, I would get the fuck out of here.”

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