Page 69 of One Lucky Cowboy

“Because I meant what I said the other day. I care about you a lot. And I’m sorry I’ve left the CAF presentation and Steel Born stuff all on your shoulders.”

“Well, I’m fine,” she said. It was true, but the word fine sounded just like it felt—flat and without color.

“Okay, you’re gonna make me do it, aren’t you?”

She tilted her head. “What’s that?”

“Fill in the blank pop quiz. Short answer only.”

She smiled. She’d missed those, though she wouldn’t be sharing that with Jax, at the risk of him becoming insufferable.

“Okay. Tell me what you’ve got.”

“I, Jill—” He looked to her.

“Penelope.”

Jax smiled. “Okay, we’re coming back to that. But for now, fill in the blank I, Jill Penelope Henley, actually feel—” He spread his arms.

“Oh, geez. That’s actually an essay response. Which is a lot to get into right now.” She hadn’t meant to get so serious, but he drew the truth from her no one else could.

“Fair enough. I apologize for not telling you,” Jax said.

“I know why you didn’t. You couldn’t until they heard it first.”

He nodded and squeezed her tenderly. “Thanks for understanding. But jokes aside, tell me the truth. How are you?”

She sighed and bit the corner of her lip, willing back the heat behind her eyes. “It was hard to see your family rally behind you like that if I’m being honest,” she admitted. “Oh, I mean, not because I didn’t want them to support you, but—”

“You want the same from your folks.”

“Exactly. I mean, they love me so much and show me the best they can. But yours … they know just how to show you in a way that matters to you. And—” How much more should she say?

He kept her gaze and gave a subtle nod.

“And I’m worried about you, as silly as that sounds. I mean, the rodeo? It’s hardly the safe job you made it out to be. I know the rodeo life, Jax. I lived it my whole life through college, but I couldn’t stand to watch it take any more of the people I cared about so I walked away from the business my parents built. That’s how strongly I feel about it. Watching you willingly take that on when you have a son to think about…” Her chest rose and fell with each rapid breath she took.

“Hey,” he said, caressing her bare skin with the pads of his thumbs. “I’m not riding.”

“You’re not?”

“No,” he said, laughing and drawing her into a tight embrace.

He released her, and she missed his solid strength almost immediately. Thankfully, he kept his hands on her upper arms. She liked the feel of him, what it did to her.

“I’m too damn old and broken—it’d kill me to get on the back of a bull like that again. I’ll be training folks part-time, and then the rest of my contract’ll be managing the safety, making PPE protocol, stuff like that.”

“Oh.” He wasn’t Liam. He wouldn’t get hurt.

“I’m sorry if I scared you like that. I know how you feel about the rodeo, but if I told you even a fraction of my plan, I worried I’d cave and tell you everything.”

“I’m impressed, to be honest. I know how much you miss the rodeo.”

He cocked his head to each side. “Yeah. I do. Mostly being part of a team, working outside around animals. I could do that here, but Bennett needs me elsewhere.”

“Have you asked him to consider moving you to Manny’s job?”

“Nah. I wouldn’t put that guy out of work just to satisfy my own needs. Leaving MBE will be hard as hell, but if it means I can keep Ren in my life, I’m glad to do whatever it takes. So much for not having kids, huh?” He chuckled and raised his brows.

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