Page 155 of Rather: The Therapist

“Okay, okay. I’m getting up.”

Two hours.

I had two hours to minimize the swelling of my eyes and reflect the same energy as my future sister-in-law. Though it wasn’t looking promising, I had a group of women ready to rally behind me and help me get my shit together so my day could truly begin.

But, first, a call to my mother was essential. I needed her light and I needed her wisdom.

FaceTime was too insulting, so I opted for a phone call, instead. As the line turned over and began to ring, I rested my back against the upholstered headboard.

I could still smell Priest on my sheets. I could still hear him sleeping soundly beside me. I could still feel him inside of me.

“Rather.”

Like a gentle hug after heartbreak, every girl needed from their mother, my mother’s voice wrapped around me.

“Mom,” I breathed out, heavily. Tears fell from my cheeks. I swiped them as quickly as they came.

“Baby, what’s the matter?”

Unable to hold it in any longer, I rushed out, “I fell in love, Mom.”

“Oh, baby, what’s with the tears?”

“It’s not with him,” I cried, “It’s not him.”

“Rather–” she sighed, “I’m sorry.”

“It’s his brother I’ve fallen for. It’s Priest.”

“Baby, I have met Priest. And, as a happily married woman when I did, I must say I don’t fault you. That young man is– He’s–”

She stumbled over her words.

“Exactly what my heart needs.”

“But can’t have.”

I shook my head. “It can’t.”

“So, hold your head high, Rather. Once the crying is over, stand tall and take your position in the family as you rightfully should. You’re not the first woman to settle for what she could have instead of what she truly wanted. You won’t be the last.”

“It breaks my heart to know this is your reality, but it’s reality nonetheless. Give yourself grace. Sulk if you want to. Cry as much as you need to. But, tomorrow, I want you standing at the altar, ten toes down, fulfilling your obligation.”

“And, when it’s all over, I want you to remain true to yourself, but true to the vows you’ve made. Waging war between brothers is not the solution. Priest was yours to have for a little while. Kofi is yours to have forever. It’s not the end of your world, Rather. It’s just the beginning of a new one.”

I digested her words, taking them for exactly what they were. She hadn’t steered me wrong in life. Today wasn’t the day she’d start.

“You hear me?”

“Yes.”

“Good.”

I paused, preparing for the ultimate heartbreak to roll off her tongue.

“Will you make it?”

“Make what?”

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