Page 167 of Chemistry: The Chemist

I didn’t hear anything after noticing the baby wasn’t in his arms.

“I have something for you.”

He held up a gold, dainty necklace with a diamond pendant. It had been unfastened and was ready to wear.

“Baby.” I sighed.

How quickly I’d forgotten gift-giving was one of his love languages.

“Turn around.”

I complied, turning in the chair, anticipating the moment my fingers would graze the beautiful diamond.

“Lift your hair, Choc.”

The sound of his voice made my blood rush. My heart pumped loudly and dramatically. So much it hurt. I swept my hair up and placed a hand on my chest.

Still.

Closing my eyes, I waited for the gold to touch my skin. The cold metal never landed. It was a full minute before I came to the conclusion.

“Baby?”

His fingers traced the ink on the back of my neck. Right in the center, in bold, black letters, was a name. His name. The name I’d given to his daughter so I was reminded of the love I once shared with him. Reminded that he existed. Reminded I’d experienced something so precious. Reminded I’d lost it all.

CHEMISTRY.

Finally, the gold fell against my skin. I flattered it with my right hand imagining how beautiful it must’ve been around my neck. The jewelry Chem had collected for me over the time span of our relationship was the only thing I’d managed to bring with me from the loft.

Everything else, I’d left with my mother for safekeeping. The shoes. The purses. The clothes. Everything was waiting for my return. But, it was possible the day would never come. I’d chosen my future and it didn’t include visits home.

“We should be going.”

Time began to move uncomfortably fast after those words left Chem’s mouth. We went from the plane to a truck. From the truck to a car. And from the car inside of a home that was surrounded by marksmen of every size and almost every color. The intense melanin was evidence they’d been in the sun for days on end.

Chem opened the door of a beautiful home and stepped aside so a breastfeeding Chemistry and I could enter. The massiveness was overwhelming. I held my daughter tighter while scanning the home for the unknown. I wasn’t sure what I was looking for exactly, but when I found it, I’d know.

“Relax, Choc.”

Chemistry’s hands caressed me, settling me at once. I followed him down the hallway until we reached a set of doors. The chatter halted my stride. I clammed, immediately, recognizing each and every voice. The happiness that radiated behind those doors was medicinal. I’d been crying for nine months straight. However, I knew that joy wasn’t a result of my presence.

“I can’t.”

Low and barely audible, I admitted to Chem.

“Yes, you can.”

“I’ve wronged them all. Uprooted their lives. Took you away from them.”

“You’ve loved their brother despite it all. You’ve kept your mouth shut about his extra-curricular activities that weren’t pleasing to the law. I have an entire fucking body that never surfaced in the evidence they had against me. You’ve proven yourself to me time and time, again, risking everything to fix what was fucked up from the start.

“If it wasn’t you, Choc, it would’ve been somebody else, and that’s what you’re failing to realize. You’ve made me a better person. You’ve made me a better man. You’ve given me every reason to love you, including the child you’re holding in your hand. I don’t give a fuck what anyone thinks about you, about us. All that matters is they respect you. I’ve made my choice. There’s nothing to worry about.

“I give you my word. It’s us, Choc, against everything and everybody. My sisters are not exempt. If they found something like we have, they’d be giving the same fucking speech. What I say would hardly even matter. That’s how love works. No one understands it but you and the person you have the pleasure of loving every single day. Do you understand?”

A nod wouldn’t suffice.

“I need words, Egypt.”

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