Page 21 of Shielding Soledad

And I was trying to do that. I stepped up whenever I could, like last night. Soledad had seemed tired, and since I was used to missions that required hours of wakefulness, I’d been glad to take Luke and let her sleep.

Whoa. What was that? I backtracked through the report I was viewing. The security system had been disarmed for over an hour earlier that morning. I looked at the information. The keypad sequence had been entered to disengage the alarm at 0615 and reset at 0759. I ran a quick diagnostic to make sure it wasn’t an error. When no problems showed, I went to find Soledad. Only the two of us had the code to shut the system off.

“Hi. Do you want some lunch?” she asked when I located her in the kitchen. “Luke’s snoozing again, so we can eat at the same time for a change.” She finished slicing tomatoes and moved on to a cucumber. A salad bowl already sat on the counter, half full of lettuce.

“That’d be nice,” I said, taking a stool at the island. “Sol?—”

“Thanks again for staying up with him last night,” she added before I could ask about the alarm.

“He’s my kid, too. You don’t need to thank me.” We’d had this conversation before, but less often since we’d become a couple again. “Did you go out this morning?”

“Yeah, you were both still asleep and I felt like running.” She grabbed sliced turkey and cheese from the refrigerator. When she turned back, her forehead was wrinkled as if she was worried about something.

“Did something happen?” I asked, concerned.

“What? No. Nothing,” she said, but there was a note of uncertainty to her words. She wasn’t telling me something. I felt sure of that. “I just ran a couple of miles.”

“You were gone nearly two hours.” I kept my tone light, hoping she’d open up to me and not wanting to give her the impression that she was caged.

“Hey.” She pointed the salad tongs at me in a playful gesture. “I’m just getting back into running. I had a baby, so my pace is off.”

“Fifty-minute miles?” I raised an eyebrow at her. She had easily run seven-minute miles in the past—and, in any case, she could crawl a mile in less than fifty minutes.

“I ran into some friends, and we got a cup of coffee,” she said, giving me a smile. Maybe that’s what had her worried—the fact that she’d been gone so long. “Time got away from me and I was gone longer than I realized, but it was nice being out for a bit.”

I understood that and didn’t want to burst her bubble of happiness, but I was nervous about her going out alone, especially when I was completely unaware of her movements. I didn’t want her to make it a habit. Bruce could come at her anytime—and would, without compunction. But how could I phrase it without scaring her or sounding overbearing?

“You should take Frankie with you.” I suggested lightly.

“She was sleeping in this morning, too.”

“No surprise. She was up with Luke and me.” The little dog had paced with me in the night, unable to settle as long as I was up. She was a faithful and smart animal, making her a fortunate addition to our home. Frankie also had a protective temperament. But that was why I wanted her to stick close to Soledad. It wasn’t as if I needed protection.

Soledad sliced a hard-boiled egg onto the salad before grabbing silverware and plates and coming to sit next to me. We bumped shoulders as we ate, while she told me about the job opportunity at the upscale store.

“Are you going to apply?” I asked, recognizing that it might be the perfect thing for her. My feelings about it, though, were mixed. She was making decent money from Carolyn and Mandy, and I knew that she was getting a little from her blog, too—but if she added another customer, she’d probably have enough money to feel comfortable moving out and getting her own place. I liked things as they were, even with the issue with Bruce hanging over my head. But I recognized that it couldn’t stay that way forever, and she seemed excited about this possibility.

“Yes,” she said after a moment, her fork paused in the air. “I need to.”

“They’d be lucky to get you,” I said, trying to put my feelings aside. I had expected to be disappointed by Soledad. No relationship in my life had avoided that emotion in the end. What I feared more now, though, was disappointing her. I was doing my best to be a good father and lover, but my best had never been enough when it came to those close to me.

“I’d have to find childcare for Luke,” she said.

“I’m around,” I volunteered. “And I’ll bet Lily would take him part time if needed, though of course she’ll have her hands full when the baby comes.” My sister-in-law was great with kids and had practically raised her younger siblings. Not to mention, she had been a teacher for a while before she’d become a nanny.

“I hadn’t thought of that,” Soledad said. “I’d want something consistent for him. I hate seeing kids bounced around to different sitters.”

“Sure,” I agreed, but I wondered if she was also trying to feel me out about my future plans. We’d avoided any direct discussion of my possible deployment, and I hadn’t shared my thoughts about retirement or the job Colin had mentioned to me. I should. I owed her that, but trusting her—or anyone—was a big step for me. We’d have to talk about our relationship soon, though. But not yet, not with Bruce’s threats hanging over us.

10

SOLEDAD

Istepped onto the back porch with Luke in my arms, craving the sunlight and warmth of a glorious Saturday morning. Alex had risen early and was already hard at work in the yard. As I settled into a chair, he stopped, eyed one of the potted plants, and turned as if evaluating where best to place it. I hadn’t questioned him when he put the magnolias and azaleas he’d purchased in colorful clay pots, but something had happened to change his mind. Two of the pots were already empty, and the others were lined up like soldiers waiting for their orders.

Gardening seemed an odd interest for a man like Alex. It was the last hobby I would have expected from him. He seemed more the type to pursue white-water kayaking or bungee jumping. Something that involved more of an adrenaline rush than putting his hands in the soil, which was what he was doing at that moment. But there was no denying that he knew what he was doing. Already, the garden was completely transformed from how it had looked before he'd come home. And I got the sense that he had a lot more in mind. At the moment, he was bent over a hole he’d dug, letting the dirt run through his fingers as if it was telling him something.

Funny how that made Alex happy, but he was tough to read sometimes. Tough to understand. Over the past several days I’d become more attuned to him than ever before, a thought that made me smile, but I didn’t fool myself into thinking I knew everything about him. That would be a mistake. Instead, I’d committed myself to enjoying what we had, because when it was good with Alex, it was amazing.