Page 50 of Proof Of Life

An hour later, the deck is packed with old friends and some new ones. Anytime guys from base get together, they’re always going to drag along stragglers, anyone who was left behind without plans, and they’re always welcome. And then you have the Base Bunnies, or Tag Chasers, the guys' temporary girlfriends. West sits in the corner with his head down, trying to avoid making conversation. I’ve overheard him dodge a few questions already, and the more alcohol these guys consume, the looser their tongues become.

Adrian Milieu, a guy from my old barracks, sits down next to West. I’ve got my eyes on them, listening in on the conversation as I flip burgers.

“What’s that?” Adrian asks.

West is flipping a coin. He catches it and traces the eagle with his fingertips. “Challenge coin.”

They’re a dime a dozen. We earn challenge coins for all kinds of things—advancement in rank, completing challenges, and meeting goals. I squint, trying to make out which one he’s holding. Fuck, he must have pulled that from his wallet. It belonged to Micah.

“What’s it stand for, freedom?” I don’t know if Adrian is trying to be clever, or if he’s just drunk, but he’s pissing me off because he’s pissing West off.

“Freedom,” West scoffs, like the notion is absurd. “Fuck freedom. We’re only free to an extent. It could be taken from us at any time. It stands for brotherhood.” West stares Adrian down with a look so cold it could ice his beer. “Brotherhood means more to me than freedom. Brotherhood could make me cross an ocean, crawl through a desert, or fight in a war I don’t believe in.” His icy gaze tracks me and locks on. “Brotherhood is what makes me choose life every day when I would rather not. It's a powerful motivator.” He returns his gaze to Adrian. “And it’s something that can never be taken from me.”

Another tweedle-dumb must have overheard because he chooses an excellent conversation starter. “Yo, the eighty-second is getting deployed. It’s just a matter of days before we get our orders.”

Enough is enough. I tap the metal spatula against the side of the grill to get everyone’s attention. “Hey, everybody listen up. We’ve got two rules here if you want to stay. First rule, we don’t talk about deployment. What happens in the desert, stays in the desert.” I let my eyes roam over each man and woman in attendance, so they know I’m speaking to them directly.

“What’s the second rule,” tweedle-dumb asks.

“The second rule is that nobody is allowed to tell West how good he still looks. It goes to his head,” I say with a laugh, trying to lighten the mood.

As predicted, everyone starts to rip on West good-naturedly, telling him how ugly he is, what terrible aim he has with a gun, and that he couldn’t blow up the broadside of a barn with a live grenade.

He smiles at me gratefully, and I breathe a sigh of relief that I made the right call. West needs this. He needs some time with these guys, to connect socially, to feel a part of again, to feel connected to the life he used to live, to the man he used to be. I know that man is still in there, somewhere, buried beneath the debris, lost in the dark. But I’m gonna find him, and I’m gonna carry him out on my shoulders if I have to because giving up on West isn’t an option. In fact, I’m sure it’s the only reason I’m still alive.

Aaron Schumer’s loud voice cuts through my thoughts. “Remember the parties we used to have here? Man, this place brings back some memories.”

When Adrian vacates his seat, I steal it. “You good?”

“When these people clear out, promise me we can spend some time out here alone, just me and you.”

Does he mean alone, as friends, talking? Or does he mean alone in the hot tub, doing… other stuff? Either way, I’m dying to find out, and suddenly I want to kick everyone to the curb so we can get on with our night.

“I promise. Just me and you. Let me get you a burger.”

Throughout the party, I can feel his eyes on me, following me from the grill to the kitchen, as I take out the trash, refill the cooler, and when a couple of girls surround me wanting to catch up, I can feel his gaze burning a hole through me, like a bug under a magnifying glass in the sun.

Is he feeling left out? Or is he jealous? I’m hoping it’s the latter.

When the last person pulls out of the driveway hours later, I breathe a sigh of relief and grab a trash bag, making my rounds as I chuck empty beer bottles and dirty paper plates.

“Let me help you,” West offers, coming to his feet.

“You just relax. I’ll take care of this.” It’s not that he can’t help, it’s that I’m doing all I can to ensure he’s in a good mood now that he’s asked to spend time alone with me.

In the kitchen, I’m putting away condiments when West shuffles in. Of course, he didn’t listen. I close the fridge and straighten, and when I turn around, he’s right there, grasping my hips and pushing me back against the counter. He’s so close to me, and his body is so warm and solid, his scent so familiar, that my heart jumps up into my throat.

Caught off guard by his unexpected boldness, all I can do is swallow and stare into his eyes, waiting for him to make the first move.

“I want to try something. Stay still.” His hands move from my hips to cup my face, and he zeroes in on the corner of my mouth. Slowly, his lips descend, but instead of the kiss I’m expecting, they brush over the spot above my upper lip, over the small dark mole. His warm breath fans over my lips and then he gently sucks the corner of my lip between his. It’s hotter than any kiss. My heart beats so hard and fast that I’m convinced I’m going to have a heart attack.

“Why am I so obsessed with this spot?” The sound of his rough voice, so deep with need, makes my cock harden. “And this spot?” he adds, trailing his mouth over my jaw, down the column of my neck, nipping with his teeth, sucking hard on my skin. His lips close over my Adam’s apple, and he suckles like it’s the head of my cock.

I grip his shoulders, pulling him closer, and his dick pushes against mine, hard and thick. My heart is pumping with adrenaline, and I feel lightheaded. His kisses are addicting. So is this feeling like I’ve become closer to him than I was, which I didn’t know was possible. West doesn’t continue lower, just rocks his hips into mine, and I guess he’s reached the extent of his courage to explore my body, so I take over, twisting him around so that it’s his ass against the counter.

My nose rubs against his temple, over his warm skin, and I can smell his citrusy shampoo. He lifts his lips from my skin with a chuckle at my maneuver, and I take advantage of the opportunity to take the lead, working my way down his neck with slow, sucking kisses. He gasps when I suck his nipple between my lips and clutches my head, tangling his fingers in my hair.

“Fuck, that’s–”

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