ONE
MARIE
The air in my father’s study felt thick with tension as we sat across from each other, his brows furrowed in deep concern and mine knitted in frustration. It was one of those conversations I dreaded, the kind that never seemed to end well. We’d had variations of it countless times, but this one was different. It was going to have to be.
Truth be told, I needed it to be.
“Dad, I’ve been thinking,” I began hesitantly, my gaze fixed on the wooden desk between us. “I want to go away to college. I know this is something that we have talked about before, but I really mean it this time. I want to explore my photography somewhere else and maybe to study business as well, to see what I can do with my work.”
His silence was suffocating, and I knew that I had just unleashed a storm. My father, Reverend Mike Oldfield, was a good man, well-meaning and kind, but he could also be overbearing, especially when it came to me. His protective instincts were a force to be reckoned with.
That was why I hadn’t left Wolf Mountain already. There were many times I wanted to, but I couldn’t because of the backlash. But I was twenty-four years old now, and it was definitely time to spread my wings and fly. I just wished my father could see that.
But instead, he leaned forward, his fingers steepled under his chin, and his piercing blue eyes locked onto mine. “Marie,” he began, his voice calm but laced with an undeniable firmness, “you know how I feel about this. This town is where you belong. You’re needed here. You can’t just go off to college and leave everything behind.”
I let out an exasperated sigh, pushing a strand of platinum-blonde hair behind my ear. “Dad, I’m not a child anymore. I’m in my twenties. I need to experience life beyond these mountains, beyond this town. I need to see what I can offer the world, what I can do.”
He leaned back in his chair, his expression never wavering. “You have a good job, Marie. You’re a talented wildlife photographer, and you make good money. You don’t need college. Besides, it’s a dangerous world out there. At least here I can keep you safe.”
I couldn’t help the incredulous laugh that escaped my lips. “Dangerous? Dad, I’ve faced grizzly bears in the wild, and you’re worried about me going to college?”
He sighed, running a hand through his graying hair. “It’s not just about the danger. It’s about the values and principles you’ll encounter out there. You know how important our faith is to me.”
I understood my father’s concerns, but I couldn’t let them dictate my life forever. “Dad, I’ll never abandon our faith. But I need to grow as a person, to find my own path, and college is a part of that. Other people go at eighteen years of age to help embrace themselves, but I didn’t.”
His gaze softened, and he reached across the desk to place a reassuring hand on mine. “Marie, I just want what’s best for you. You’re my only family, and I worry about you.”
Tears welled up in my eyes, and I felt a pang of guilt for defying him. “I know, Dad. But I need to do this. I need to be my own person.”
He shook his head at me. “You can be your own person here, Marie. Who knows who you’ll meet out there? I mean, I know everyone here. I know there’s nothing to worry about.”
I narrowed my eyes at him. “What is that supposed to mean? What people?”
“You know what I mean. Men.” He folded his arms across his chest. “I don’t want you getting hurt by some idiot man. You deserve so much better than that.”
I rolled my eyes angrily. “Dad, I’m not going to date anyone here because I know them all. Because I don’t want to date any of them. They’re no good.”
“And you think the men out there will be any better? You’re going to be sorely mistaken.”
I gritted my teeth together, enraged honestly. All I wanted to do was live a normal life, to do what everyone did. I couldn’t believe that I was having so much trouble trying to just do ordinary things. Over the years, I’d dated a couple of guys in this town, but it never worked out. They were immature and annoying. More sibling-like because we’d lived in the same place forever and we all knew one another too well.
I needed to get out, before this crushed my soul.
“Dad, I need to go. I have to.”
“You can’t go, Marie. I won’t support you.”
I knew what he meant with this. That he wouldn’t support me financially so I could go. I did earn a good wage with my photography, but it wasn’t enough. I couldn’t start a new life with that money, so if I was going to do this of my own accord then I would have to get a second job. I knew my father wouldn’t like that, of course, but I was going to have to stand on my own two feet somehow. I would just have to do this on my own.
“Okay, well, I guess there’s nothing else we can talk about then, is there?”
I rose up to my feet, staring down at my father who wasn’t going to budge one bit. “Thanks for hearing me out, even if you don’t really want to listen to me.”
Dad was the one who now gritted his teeth, but I still wasn’t going to just let him have his own way. I’d spent the last twenty-odd years backing down and letting him win, but now I couldn’t do it. Now I was starting to realize that I needed to find some inner strength.
“Marie, one day you will see that I’m doing all of this for your own good,” he insisted, despite knowing that was going to wind me up further. “I have forty-seven years of life under my belt. I know what I’m talking about. I have had life experience, you know? I’ve been through some stuff, so I know what’s happening here, and I know what’s best for you.”
I wanted to scream. I wanted to let everything out so he could really see, but I knew that wasn’t going to get me anywhere. He would just start talking about Mom again, and I didn’t want that. I couldn’t stand hearing the stories of Mom when I was just a baby because she was ‘too young to be a mother’ and ‘couldn’t handle marriage’. Just because Dad was twenty-three when I was born and Mom twenty-one didn’t mean I was going to make all the same mistakes.