Page 32 of Quiet Confessions: Part Two

“That son of a bitch,” Cal curses.

“Dad kept saying that Pay ran off and got cold feet over the engagement,” Nate sighs, laying his head on Patience’s forehead. “He won’t get away with this shit. He can’t.”

“That’s why you’re all staying with me from now on,” Ki explains. “I want him to have less access to you all. He’ll find out soon enough that you’re both safe. It means we need to dig up shit to bury his ass. I have a feeling your grandfather knew too, Pay.”

“He what?!” she gasps. “There was a time I thought he actually loved me, but I’m learning I’m just a fucking pawn.”

“Patience, rabbit,” Nate says. “We’ll take his ass down too. Right now, let’s focus on getting you both cleaned up, and I’m a little worried about your head. Do you feel dizzy?”

“It’s not so bad anymore,” she shrugs. Compared to the last few months, pain is relative.

“She lost consciousness for a while,” I tell them, ignoring her glare.

“I don’t want to go to the hospital,” she complains.

“You won’t, baby,” Ki soothes. “I can call in a doctor that does house calls just to make sure you’re both alright. No hospitals.”

I relax too at the sound of that. I just want to sleep in a bed without being poked and prodded.

As we pull up to Kian’s place, I sigh. “I would kill for a shower. I feel bad because I’m pretty sure I’m getting blood on your leather.”

“I’ll get it cleaned tomorrow,” Ki says, unbothered. “I really don’t care. I’m glad today is ending well. We could have been too late.”

On that somber note, we go inside and Kian shows Pay and I where we can shower. He follows her into his room and I have a feeling they're due for a very honest conversation. The man has been pushing her away for what he thinks is her own good, and I know it’s been hurting Patience.

I know it does, because I have a feeling that Cal did the same thing to me. Except I wasn’t protected from anything. Walking slowly, I walk into the bathroom in another one of the bedrooms. It feels… surreal to be in the real world again. That’s the only way I can describe it.

I begin to close the door to the bathroom behind me, but decide against it. It’s nice to have a choice—door open, door closed, hot or cold water… I can do whatever I want.

A bubble of laughter escapes my lips, and I clap my hand over my mouth as I turn to shower to a piping hot temperature. If I let myself keep laughing, I’ll dissolve into hysterical crying.

Making sure I have a towel nearby, I strip off my clothes and get into the stall. This bathroom is really nice and nothing like the ones in the sex club. I keep reminding myself of things that are different as I grab the body wash and start lathering my body.

I wouldn’t have nice smelling body wash.

The light would be dim.

There would be someone watching my every move.

I am FREE.

Tears start to leak from my eyes, mixing in with the water from my shower, and I struggle to ignore it. Sniffling, I start to wash my hair. The door to the shower opens, startling me into a yell.

“I’m sorry,” Cal mutters, still wearing his boxers as he gets in.

“Why are you wearing clothes in the shower?” I ask, confused.

“I wanted to talk, wash your hair, and tell you that I love you. I treated you like such shit before you were taken…”

“I know, but I kind of get that you were doing it because your dad can’t handle the fact that you like a guy,” I shrug. “Nixen’s idea of what it’s like to be a man is very black and white, and you had to fit that idea.”

“How are you so cool with this?” Cal asks, moving around me to dig his fingers into my hair. The groan I release is porn star worthy, but he just chuckles. “Let me grovel a bit, baby. You deserve it. I was a dick, even though you and Pay are my entire world. I adore you, and I’ve spiraled without you.”

I let Cal rinse my hair as I think. Do I want him to grovel? No, I don’t need it. I just need to know that it won’t happen again. I want to know that there’s room for me too. Fuck…

“Cal… What if you don’t love me anymore? The things I did at the club were… awful,” I mutter.

“You can’t cheat on someone under duress,” he says gently, pulling my back against his chest. “If you had to fuck someone to stay alive, I’ll never hold it against you.”

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