Page 13 of Unexpected Second Chance For Love

“You’re very welcome, Austin. Welcome home.”

* * *

Coffee in hand, Austin walked the streets of Wildwood Falls. The trees had turned gorgeous shades of color and against the blue sky, it almost felt surreal. Like he’d stepped into a movie. This is what he loved about Montana. It was the most beautiful place on the planet as far as he was concerned.

How had he managed to stay away so long? Guilt was a powerful motivator as it kept him from his hometown for longer than he’d planned. Austin was back now and needed to make the most of it.

Everywhere he looked, another memory surfaced. It was as if they lay dormant, waiting for the right time to make themselves known. Some memories were sweet, like the many trips to town with his family as a child for various festivals and events.

Some were bittersweet. As an adolescent, so many included Emily. Walking hand in hand during the summer as they listened to the river rushing past town. Drinking hot chocolate and marveling at the holiday lights and standing in the crisp winter air for the tree lighting.

Austin wished he could go back and do it all over. Soak in every moment fully present. To convince Emily not to drive to visit her friend that fateful day. The weather had turned stormy that August and the lowered visibility of rain contributed to the car that drifted over the line and took everything that mattered to him.

Even though everyone, most especially Griffin, assumed he’d proposed to Emily because of the unplanned pregnancy, Austin knew different. He’d known he wanted to marry Emily from their very first kiss. The baby just sped up the timeline a little. His future was laid out for him and he couldn’t be happier. Marriage, children, taking on more responsibility on his family ranch. Plans that had been set for him long before he’d consciously thought about what he’d wanted.

Austin was content. Until the day he lost it all and suddenly nothing mattered. Without the future he’d taken for granted, he lost himself and walked away from it all. The ranch, his family, his friends.

His friends had turned on him first. They’d blamed him for stealing Emily from their mutual friend Tom, even though Emily had seen Tom as just a friend. Just as that scandal was blowing over, Emily’s pregnancy became apparent and she and Austin eloped. He hoped his friends would understand when they realized he truly loved Emily and would be supportive of their budding family.

Then, the night of the accident changed everything. Emily died in a car crash at six months pregnant. Austin lost his wife and daughter in the same moment. And the friends who had accepted their relationship suddenly started playing the what if game. What if Austin hadn’t snuck a kiss at the party down by the river? What if Emily hadn’t thrown aside her longtime friend and assumed boyfriend Tom for the charming Austin? What if Emily had married Tom, as had been expected instead of becoming pregnant with Austin’s baby?

So many possibilities of how things could have been different. No one factored in Austin’s grief as they were lost in their own. Tom certainly did his part to stir the pot, being vocal about his grief. Just because someone knew someone longer didn’t mean their grief was more or less significant.

Austin was left on his own to grapple with the losses. His own best friend, Griffin had turned on him too. He’d judged Austin for the brazen kiss that set off the chain of events. They’d had their first real fight since they’d met while in diapers. It might have turned out okay and they might have realized their tempers were fueled by grief and worked it out. After all, it was their senior year of high school and it was supposed to be the best year of their life so far. Except a few months later, Griffin’s father died unexpectedly and he withdrew even further.

No amount of reaching out made a difference and Griffin became a shell of the person he’d been. The moment they graduated, Griffin took off and didn’t look back. At least until he returned a few years ago. Austin had reached out and attempted contact, but Griffin hadn’t responded.

Grief settled in Austin’s chest. This was the reason it took so long for him to return to Wildwood Falls. He was back now and determined to face the ghosts that had driven him away. He’d had enough therapy under his belt to have the confidence he could manage the memories without coming completely undone.

He took a deep breath, allowing the crisp air to clear his thoughts. He focused on slowly sipping his coffee, noting his surroundings as he’d learned to do with this therapist. How many green things could he spot? The trees, the sign for the thrift shop, a car driving by…

Thud. His shoulder bumped into something that stopped him in his tracks.

“I’m sorry,” he said then froze. The shoulder he’d bumped into belonged to someone very familiar. He was face to face with Emily’s parents.

The Andersons looked much as they had more than a decade ago, just a bit more gray hair. Her parents looked just as shocked as him and paled as if they had seen a ghost. Which they likely had since their daughter’s memory was inextricably tied to Austin.

Both parties stood frozen in their shock and memories. Austin was the first to break the spell.

“Hello.” A simple word, yet it felt nearly impossible to choke out.

He was met with stony silence. Tears formed in the corner of Mrs. Anderson’s eyes and she frantically brushed them away. Mr. Anderson’s mouth turned down into a frown.

Austin wracked his brain for any topic of conversation. The best he could come up with was the most obvious. “I’m back in town.”

“I see that,” Mr. Anderson replied.

Austin was blocking the sidewalk and the Anderson’s path away from this train wreck of a meeting. He couldn’t let them go without saying something. The funeral had been painful and he hadn’t had the words to express how he felt back then. He wasn’t sure he had them now, but he had to try.

“I miss her too, you know. I’m sorry for how everything turned out and I wish I could change the past. But I can’t. It tears me up inside every day.”

That was as close to his true feelings as he could muster. He watched the Anderson’s expression for any softening and his gut clenched when he saw the same stony stares. At least he’d said something. He hadn’t let the silence overwhelm him like he had at the funeral.

As much as he knew it wasn’t his fault, he couldn’t help but carry the guilt that the world placed on him. Facing her parents helped him let go, just a little bit. He stepped aside and let the Andersons walk away, no closer to a reconciliation than he’d been earlier.

Except, as he made his way down the sidewalk to his truck, his steps were just a bit lighter and he held his head higher. His most dreaded interaction had occurred, and he’d faced it head on instead of running. Sometimes the fears that live in our mind are larger than the reality we experience. Running into the Andersons was a reminder of what his therapist always told him, yet he continuously struggled to believe.

Austin was capable of facing his grief and was worthy of love.

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