Page 118 of Mob Princess

“I don’t offer as penance. I offer it because I want to comfort you.”

“Later. Right now, just don’t get beyond my reach. I will panic.”

She nods slowly before she presses a kiss to my forehead. We stand and fix our clothes. I lead her out to the living room. It’s only the cleaners.

“They’re in the SUV.”

I nod to the guy who lets me know where my family went. I figured as much. One man walks over with Lina’s gun. He’s about to hand it to me when I tilt my head toward her. Once we’re in the hallway, I watch her pull up her dress and slide it into the thigh holster I saw but didn’t comment about.

We go out to the vehicle in silence. It’s not until we’re two blocks from Lucy’s apartment that any of us speak.

“Justin did this.”

I suspected that was a possibility, but I didn’t expect it. I suspected he’d find a way to fuck me over because he loves her. But I didn’t expect him to take it this far. There has to be another reason than just a tantrum over not getting the toy he wanted.

I watched Lina as she said those three words. I wonder if there’s a twinge of sadness that her friend put her in the middle, and now that friendship is over.

There’s not.

It’s calm anger.

As in, she won’t explode. But after what I saw with Lucy, Justin’s fate is sealed. She will do something far worse, given the chance. I don’t want her anywhere near that. I know she said she’s killed before, and that’s something I need to hear about. But I don’t want her to have a childhood friend’s death on her conscience. When she reflects on this with time, I don’t want that to be a memory.

She turns to look at me. We read each other’s minds at times, and this is one of them when I wish she couldn’t.

“You will not convince me to go home and wait for you. You don’t know Justin like I do. You don’t know how he’ll act when cornered. He won’t lash out, but neither will he give up. He threatened your life, but he betrayed me.”

Loyalty is as important to her as it is to me and the rest of my family. That is the bedrock of a syndicate’s survival. Loyalty to the organization above all else. Loyalty within my family before anyone else keeps our syndicate strong. Betraying Lina was the worst crime Justin could commit in her eyes. It’s a betrayal of Rowan and Ewan. She might not care about either of them as a father and a brother, but she cares that Justin betrayed their family, their branch’s bosses.

“Ewan was on the phone with me since I left your parents’ house. He heard all of it. He will send men for Justin. If Ewan gets to Justin first, he won’t turn him over to you. But he knows me well enough to understand if he kills Justin on my behalf—or claims it’s on my behalf—things will be irrevocably severed. Justin’s betrayal of me is one of several to Ewan and my dad as his bosses. But they trusted him with my life. I trusted him with my life. Ewan knows Justin is mine. Sean, you have no more chance of convincing me otherwise than Ewan. He did this, at least partly because of me.”

I lean to whisper in her ear even though this isn’t something so private the rest of my family won’t hear me say at least once more.

“I don’t want this for you, cailín. I don’t want you to have another death on your hands. In your memory. I need you to trust that I’ll handle this. You’ve already been sucked in too far. You were born into this world, but this is a part of it you were never meant to join. Let us take him to our place. Let me get justice. I will never let you see what I’m capable of. But he deserves all of it.”

“That’s all true. But physical pain won’t break him. Justin was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder several years ago and has been under medical care for it ever since. It’s well managed and not as severe as for some people, but one characteristic of BPD is a high tolerance for pain. I think it stems from the disassociation that can be part of the condition. It’s not that he has no threshold for pain. He does. But he’s been a thrill-seeker since we were kids. He injured himself all the time, but it didn’t deter him. He got used to being in pain and has a high tolerance. When things came to a head, and he sought treatment, it was because he’d started harming himself. In some ways, he believes he deserves the pain. I’m telling you, stringing him up and beating him won’t get him to talk. I know what will.”

“Tell me what to say to him.”

We’re not whispering, but we’re speaking quietly. I know the others can hear. It saves me having to repeat it, but it gives a sense of privacy at the same time.

“It’s not that simple. There are things only a handful of us would know, and it would only affect him hearing it from us. Ewan, Colt, and I are among the people who’ve known Justin the longest. Ewan and Colt know him better than I do, but Justin has guarded me since we were in high school. If you want Justin before Ewan gets to him, then it’ll only be worth it if I’m there, too.”

Could Lina be spinning me a tale just so she can have her pound of flesh? Is revenge that important to her? I think it is important, but I don’t think she’d lie. It makes me wonder what the fuck she has on him. What could be so traumatic or triggering that only a handful of people could talk about it, and only that would make him crack? Would it bother him if other people found out, or would he still stay silent? Would my knowing whatever this is do nothing at all?

I’ve worked over plenty of people able to disassociate themselves from the situation without having any mental health challenges. Hell, every bratva member fits that description. What is it about Justin that makes his disassociation so different? From what I know about BPD, people who have it often fear abandonment. Is that part of what Lina knows from Justin’s past? Is this what spurred Justin into attacking me? He fears Lina abandoning him?

“Where’s he likely to be if he’s in New York?”

“I don’t know. As far as I know, he doesn’t have that many connections down here. He followed me here the last time, and he’s traveled with my family and me when I came here with Dad and Ewan. But I never asked or was told if he came to the city on his own.”

“Would he answer if you called?”

“He knows I know, so probably not.”

“Texts?”

“Maybe. I can try.”

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