Page 119 of Mob Princess

Lina pulls out her phone and taps her contacts, scrolling until she gets to his name. She taps the screen again and pauses as she considers what to say.

Lina

I could have been hurt if I’d been at the club with Sean. I’ve been there before.

She looks up at me. She’s holding her phone so I can easily see the screen. We wait. We’re entering my parents’ neighborhood when a response comes in.

Justin

No you haven’t. That’s why it had to be there. Somewhere you couldn’t get involved.

Lina

Involved. Not hurt.

Her face shows her disgust. I can practically hear her saying fuck you.

Justin

Obviously you can defend yourself better than the little bitch you think you’re with.

Lina

Think?

Justin

You can’t fuck someone when they’re dead. At least that’s not what you’ve been into.

Lina

Gross. I am with Sean.

Justin

For now. You can’t be everywhere. You won’t find everyone. Lucy was too obvious. I’ll do better next time.

Lina

And if I really am with Sean next time? You’d let me be a casualty?

Justin

You’ll be home the next time.

Lina

All the more reason I’d be with him if we’re home.

Justin

Don’t be stupid. Boston

Lina

Boston isn’t home and never will be. Sean’s home. Montreal’s home.

My hand’s been resting on her thigh. I squeeze it when I read she considers me home. Not the city. Not my place. Not even a place we share. Me. Like being with me—being in my arms—me inside her—that’s what feels like home. I get that with a soul deep understanding I never imagined I’d experience. I knew it was possible from the other couples in my family. I just didn’t think I’d have that too.