Page 61 of Dust to Dust

I turned and planted my hands on my hips, "Then stop me!" I dared him.

Titan had denied me his touch as my punishment. It was a new form of torture. I'd dream at night of his fingers caressing me. His invisible touch helped mend me and make me whole again. Yet my dreams could only satiate me for so long. I needed his actual touch to survive. Titan had successfully made me addicted to him.

Damian had become my only friend here in the secluded mountain house we came to for my recovery. He visited me throughout the day and tried to talk to me. His approach seemed genuine, and I knew deep down Damian wanted me to recover so Titan could. I just needed Titan to forgive me.

"Look at me! Talk to me!" I demanded when I noted Titan’s eyes were downcast.

"And say what!" He snapped in a pain filled, haunted tone.

"Fuck you. I hate you. How could you!" I suggested, "Take your pick."

Silence lingered. I could see the vultures circling overhead, waiting to pick us apart once our love for each other died.

I shook my head, "You're a pussy." I threw my hands up in defeat and anger.Fight for me, you fucker!"You can't stand the fact that a woman got your kill? So much for promising me revenge." That's what it had to be, right? He felt emasculated that I was able to kill the great Franco Fontaine.

Blue eyes so cold locked onto me, "You're not even close."

I rolled my eyes, "Then what is it?" Of course, he didn't answer. I turned and zipped up my bag, and marched to the door. He moved then, grabbed my bag, and tossed it against the wall, where it made a loud thud and tumbled to the floor.

I opened my palm and smacked his pretty face. I wanted the beast to come out. I walked past him; hands grabbed my hips as they pulled me back into the room. He walked us to the bed, where he tossed me onto it. A look of panic washed over his face as his eyes flashed down to my stomach. Worried, he broke open my healing wound.

"It would take a lot more than that to hurt me." I pushed up on my elbows and watched as he struggled to speak.

"I can't ever trust you." He voiced. He ran his hand through his golden hair as he fought the voices in his head. It was like he was trying to knock off the crown on his head.

Deep down, my husband felt unworthy. That was my doing, but I couldn't apologize for what I did. I'd do it again a million times over.

"When it comes to your safety," I edged closer to him but kept some space, "I'll always jump in front of the bullet."

His teeth sank into his lip as he shook his head, "That's not how this marriage is supposed to be."

"You said we are equals. What gives you the right to risk it all for me?"

His pain was mine. My heart, which already was in pieces, crumbled again as pain marked his beautiful features. "I just want to make the pain stop. I want this to stop so we can try to be those two people again. The boy and girl that loved so easily." I stripped down my mask and let the tears fall. That's what he wanted, feelings. So I gave them willingly. Nova King wasn't a mask of an emotionless void, and she wasn't ashamed to show her husband her inner self.

Titan turned, I thought he was going to walk away, but he sat on the bed next to me. "We can't go back, babygirl. We are not those two kids."

I knew he was right, but a girl can dream. Or was I left to suffer my nightmares?

We sat in silence for what felt like hours. I didn't dare speak or move because this was the closest we had been for a month. Titan shifted and squared his shoulders at me. He reached out and slowly pushed me back to lie on the bed. His fingers traced my curves over my clothing. He lifted my shirt, and then traced over my new scar. The lines were angry and jagged, bright red against my pale skin. I saw the deep hurt in his blue eyes, like a ship sinking to the bottom of a dark, terror-filled ocean.

"I love you," I declared as his fingers traced the mark back and forth as if he were trying to erase it. "Let's erase it.” I pleaded.

"Erase what?" He took his fingers off my skin, and the absence of his touch chilled my body.

"Our sins. A clean slate." I was begging him as best as I knew how to.

"It doesn't work like that, babygirl."

"Why not? Lucas took poison to give his life to you, to erase his father's sins so you'd be free." I stood and then turned my body to straddle him. He didn't grab my hips as I wished he would have.

Leaning forward, I pressed my breasts against the rugged plains of his chest as I cupped his face. My nipples hardened over the friction, and I hoped he could feel what his presence did to me. "If I could forgive you for everything, why can't you forgive me?"

Chapter 49

Her blonde hair hung loosely around her pale face. She was the perfect mix of Elsa and Nova. Nova King wasn't afraid to show me she cared. Fuck, she was willing to die for me. I finally had her where I wanted her, vulnerable enough to show me what soul laid behind her rigid walls but not weak enough to be crushed. Yet, I couldn't find it in me to forgive her.

We didn't return to the campus house. Instead, we flew to my home in Aspen, surrounded by the mountains and summer air. It's remote and safe, the land untouched—the opposite of us. I had a doctor and nurse stationed at the house to care for my wife. They gave me hourly reports through the night.

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