Page 62 of Dust to Dust

Nova fought so hard to break me, to grab my mask and strip it off. The roles had changed, for better or for worst. Her legs framed mine as she straddled me. Trapping me. The warmth of her petite body pushed onto mine like a blanket covering me from the harsh cold reality of my crimes. My index fingers touched her thighs, but I longed to feel so much more. I want to grab her, roll her over and pour my love and hate into her. So I did the opposite as I pushed my palms into the bed sheets. It was a cheap trick, the sheets gave me no relief, but her skin would…

She cupped my face, her hands feeling so tiny. "If I could forgive you for everything, why can't you forgive me?"

Pale grey eyes begged me to surrender, but that wasn’t so easy to do. After all, I was a King, and King men did not bend a knee so easily. I should be able to forgive her. After all, she was right. She forgave me. I was weaker than the woman who was begging me.Just try.My body begged my mind. It longed for her touch, to be inside of her because shewashome.

"I told you, I can't live without you," My fury slipped. "We should have faced the rite together."

"And if we did, one of us would be dead." She hissed. She ground her body down on mine, "I'm here in your arms because of my choice. The decision to protect you."

"I didn't need your protection!" I bellowed. My hands grabbed her hips with force, and I snapped. The tips of my fingers would leave bruises on her flesh. "I. Needed. You."

My lips pressed against Nova's mouth as I poured my beast inside her. I didn't give her a chance to respond. I flipped her on the bed and gave in to my desires. Between my brutal attack, I tore the clothes from her. Her lips fought to stay on any part of my body they could taste. Then in one push, I was home, buried deep inside her heat that was always ready for me.

"You have all of me," she moaned, arching her neck back so I could taste it. I did. I licked the sweet, salted honey that always covered her skin. Her hands clawed down my back, but it wasn't enough. I needed to be closer to her. I’d never to let her go.

I needed to chain her to my side.

I slipped my hands under her back and arched her hips up so I could sink deeper inside her. Her back bridged more as it tried to melt into my body and become one. We both came so fast that I didn't even know how I spiraled into this situation.

Where had my strength gone?

My resistance vanished as soon as I tasted her.

That was Nova's power. Nova brought me to my knees and fucked with my head. The more I resisted her, the more I became addicted to her. I pulled out of her, pushed off the bed, and stood with my back to her. Reaching for my pants, I pulled them back up.

"Don't you dare fucking leave!” She fumed, but her hate was gone and replaced with hurt when I started to make for the door.

Good, I wanted her to feel hurt and betrayed.

Used.

That's how I felt when she went on a suicide mission. She betrayed our marriage, my trust, and most of all, my love.

* * *

I lay in bed, unable to sleep. This happened most nights. I'd wake frantically searching the bed for my wife, who wasn't there. Footsteps sounded down the hall. The closest guest room was just a few feet from my room. I had moved Nova in there. I didn't need her in my space.

I didn't need her.Keep telling yourself that.

We had sex just hours ago. I hoped it would sate my need, but it only poured oil into the fire. I once thought it would be hell to live without her, but now it was hell either way. Seeing her every day, knowing I failed to protect her. New scars marked her skin, marks I vowed never to allow happen.

The handle of my door twisted then the door opened. Even in the dark, I knew it was her. The dark silhouette was long and lean. It flared slightly at the hips. I loved to grab her hips. Each step she took was light, like a dancer gliding across the stage.

"You're awake," She murmured as she approached my bed.

I rolled to my left side and away from her. The covers were ripped back, and then she slipped into my bed. She crawled close. I could smell her scent which was my body wash. Her arms wrapped around my body as she pulled the covers back up. She was spooning me, but she was the bigger spoon. Once again, she took on the role of our protector.

"What are you doing?"

"Sleeping." She snuggled closer, "Now shush!"

Maybe it was the room's darkness or the fact that I was inside of her mere hours ago. I turned and switched our roles. She allowed my change without a fight. "This means nothing," I grunted as I wrapped my arms and legs around her. I caged her too tightly, but she didn't object.

"Hmm," was all she said.

Soon her breathing evened out, but I still laid awake. I didn't want to wake up from this.

My wife and my nightmare.

---