Page 25 of Made for You

Her nose scrunches. “Can’t?”

“I...can’t defend myself in the same way that you all can.”

Sure, I can self-protect—but not if it means harming another person. Fighting my assailant? Out of the question. When the woman grabbed my hair, I knew she was about to bash my head, and in the moment, it was like I had no willpower. No spark, no reaction; I went limp and let her do it. Should I find this disturbing? Emma’s shocked expression tells me yes.

“Julia, what are you saying?” she says.

I prop myself up despite the shooting pain in my shoulder, glance at Josh, then address the whole group of girls.

“Not all of you know this, but I guess you should. I’m a Synth.”

There are audible gasps.

“I can’t hurt people,” I explain. “It’s just not part of my...” I almost say programming, but think better. “Instincts.”

“But self-defense has to be different, right?” objects Emma, the crowd of girls murmuring loudly behind her, clearly upset.

I shrug my shoulders up an inch.

“It’s not different for them,” says Camila in a pointed, sharp tone. She steps forward, a striking figure in an elegant black cover-up with a plunging neckline that shows the center string of her white bikini. “Haven’t y’all watched Keeping Up with the Synths? Chrystel explained the whole thing after she went public about her sexual assault.” Her eyes turn to me. “There’s only one case where a Synth can hurt a human. Right, Julia?”

Everyone looks to me for clarification.

I feel like getting technical is just going to make me seem more foreign to them, and to Josh, but I can’t shy away now. I have to appear comfortable with myself so that they can be, too. Then we can all move on.

“No Harm coding is black-and-white,” I explain. “But there’s a separate algorithm called the Leighton Clause because of this case, like, ten years ago. Have you guys heard of Andrea Leighton?”

“Wasn’t she in that really bad horror movie?” Zoe pipes up, snapping her fingers. “Night of the...something?”

“She was a Texas oil heiress and aspiring actress,” says Camila, calm and in control, for which I’m strangely grateful. “She owned one of those Home Assistant Bots—remember when those came out? Anyway, her boyfriend strangled her in front of it. The Bot could have taken him down and saved her if it wasn’t for No Harm. Long story short, there was a public outcry, and Congress passed an exception clause. But there were so many bugs, it didn’t roll out until Christi and Chrystel.”

“How do you know all this?” says Emma.

Cam smiles mirthlessly. “My father’s in the oil business. Andrea was a family friend. The Bot that couldn’t save her? My dad uses it to clean our pool.”

My heart patters uncomfortably.

“So what is the algorithm, exactly?” says Emma, wrinkling her brow.

Cam opens her mouth, but I beat her to it. “If I see someone hurting another person, and the ethical algorithm determines that there’s a guilty party and an innocent party worthy of defense, No Harm is bypassed.”

“Which means,” Camila cuts in, raising a sharp-nailed finger, “that even though Julia couldn’t defend herself, if that crazy fan attacked one of all y’all—” she pauses, a smirk tugging at her lips “—then Julia could’ve fucked that bitch up.”

I get the reference, and give her the slightest smile in return. It strikes me that she could do more damage with that single, manicured nail than I could with my entire body.

“But it doesn’t seem right that she could defend us when she can’t—” Emma starts again.

“I think what Julia needs right now is our full support,” interrupts Josh, his deep voice bringing this whole uncomfortable topic to a welcome end. “And she has it, right?” He’s firm, commanding, like a general bringing order to his troops.

The girls’ voices rise in agreement, but a smell of fear lingers, and I don’t have to ask to know what it’s about.

The girls have to be wondering not only what would have happened if they were the ones walking alone by the pool, but what it’s like to be me: helpless. At the mercy of any lunatic who wants to hurt me.

I lick my lips. I’ve loved being Julia ever since Launch Day. I’ve relished my body, my feelings—even the hard emotions, like my ever-present gnawing hunger for Josh’s affection. But there’s something new within me. A seed of distress. I don’t like that I’m fundamentally...weak. My thoughts rush to comfort me. Isn’t everyone fundamentally weak, at some level? And yet...

“We’re all behind you, Julia,” says Josh, his voice full of warmth. “I promise you that nothing like this will ever happen again when you’re with me.”

“It’s not your responsibility to protect me.” My voice cracks, because I don’t want this dynamic. I want to be pure fun for Josh. Not a burden, dragging him down.

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