Page 65 of Shattered

Clearly, I’ve officially lost the fight to keep her at arm’s length. My mind is still a messy mix of wanting this so badly and feeling fucking terrified. Reasons for why we should stop float through my mind, but the reasons for not stopping chase them away.

I kiss her slowly while my heart bashes against my chest, pumping blood through to every extremity, including my dick.

A moment ago, I was barely awake, but the second her soft lips touched mine, my body lit up like it was given a jolt of energy.

Deepening the kiss, I revel in the high that finally experiencing this with her is giving me. The feel of her touch—her hands moving, roaming over my chest and up my neck—sends my senses into a frenzy.

I could get lost in this moment, drowning in the feel of her lips, but before I get too carried away, my senses trickle back in, and I slow the kiss, laying a few pecks over her lips before pulling back and resting my forehead against hers.

“What are we doing?”

Her eyes are still closed, breaths coming out fast. “I think we’re doing something that has been a long-time coming.”

Lifting my head, I watch as her eyes open, slightly hazy and drunk on the kiss. The bright blue reminds me of the sky on a sunny day. “Is that all it is?”

Her head slowly moves back and forth, eyes locked on mine. “No. I think this would be . . . everything.”

My mouth is on her again, a little more aggressive this time.

My mind, my heart, and my cock are all fighting to control the situation. But I think the latter is winning right now.

Our kiss heats up quickly, burning a little hotter as my hands roam over her. The need to touch her intensifies, the need to feel her beneath me. Fuck, I want that. And I haven’t wanted it in a long time.

I place my hands on her waist, rubbing back and forth before I travel lower to grip her jean-clad thighs and urge her leg over mine so she’s straddling me.

Bringing my hands back up to her face, I angle her mouth, dipping my tongue in to swirl with hers. Her taste has a dizzying effect on me, making me crave it more and more. I slide my fingers into her hair, loving the feel of the soft strands gliding between them. Then I lower them over her shoulders and down her back, wanting to touch her everywhere.

I grip her ass, pulling her into me more so I can feel the heat between her legs. I know she can feel how hard I am beneath her, and when she starts rocking against me, a groan is pulled from my chest.

A moment later, Sienna is pushing herself back, separating our mouths. “Wait.” Trying to catch her breath, she drops her gaze, and I watch as the little diamond in her nose sparkles in the lamplight. “I know you’ve probably been with a lot of other women, but I’m—”

“You’re wrong,” I cut in, my eyes swinging back up to her eyes. I curl my finger under her chin and tilt it so she’s looking directly at me. “You’re wrong.”

We haven’t discussed any other relationships that we may have had over the past few years, likely because neither of us wants to know anything about them. But her assumption about me couldn’t be any farther from the truth, and I want her to know that.

She licks her lips. “I am?”

I’m momentarily stuck on her reddened lips, the feel of them lingering on my own. But then I register the words that just came out of them. “I haven’t been with anyone else since that night with Adi’s mother.”

I watch as what I said sinks in, her mouth parting in surprise. “You haven’t?” Blue eyes bounce back and forth between mine. “How? You’re you and so handsome, and your body is . . .” She waves a hand at my body but doesn’t say anything.

Her compliment has a timid smile touching my lips, and I drop my hands to her thighs, stroking my thumbs over her legs before glancing off to the side. “It’s human nature to want to avoid something that caused your life to shatter before you.”

Sure, the need for a release arose often, but I just took care of it myself. I never had the desire to seek anybody out. I didn’t have the desire for sex—not until the woman in my lap suddenly appeared, drawing out all sorts of buried feelings.

This time, it’s her hands that grip my jaw, turning me back to face her right before her mouth lands on mine. Her lips are warm and soft as she sucks my bottom lip in, sending a shot of lust straight to my cock. Lifting my hands to her cheeks, I kiss her back with every ounce of passion in my body.

My skin feels hot, tight, and alight—like it’s seconds away from peeling back and exposing the raw desperation I have for her. I angle my head and delve further, circling my tongue with hers. She may be a sunflower, but she also bathes me in light, setting everything inside me ablaze.

She kisses me back just as fiercely, tangling her fingers through my hair and moaning into my mouth. With a sultry roll of her hips, she grinds down over my cock, making my eyes roll, and I drop my hands to her hips to slow her down.

Fuck, if she keeps that up, I’m going to embarrass myself. It’s a good thing I jerked off in the shower earlier. I had barely finished and got out of the shower when I heard the doorbell.

Gripping her ass, I lift her up and get to my feet, then drop her down onto the couch before coming down on top of her. With most of my weight on my elbows, I cradle her head in my hands, sweeping my gaze over her lips, her nose, and her eyes. “You’re beautiful.”

“I’m a virgin,” she blurts, causing me to lift an inch off her in surprise. Closing her eyes, she sucks in a breath. “That’s what I started to say earlier. I’m a virgin. I haven’t been able to give away something that was always meant to be yours.”

I blink down at her, speechless, a wave of conflicting feelings barreling into me. On the one hand, I’m relieved she hasn’t been with other guys, because just the thought of it made me want to mash my teeth together. But on the other hand, I’m flooded with feelings of guilt and unworthiness.

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