Page 51 of Shattered

“No, shit. Really?” Jason’s eyebrows raise. “You went to the prison?”

I cross my arms, keeping myself guarded around him. “I sent him a letter first. Nothing fancy, just asking for permission to see him. He approved. Went to the prison and was standing in line, then I got a call that Navi was in labor so I left. He probably thought I was a no-show and took me off the approved list.”

“Shitty.” He blows out a whistle, scratching the back of his head. “I haven’t really talked to anyone, though I’ve sent some texts to Campbell here and there.”

I nod, and a few silent beats pass where we both focus our attention on Adi, as if that will make the stifling tension in the room go away.

Jason shifts again, resting his elbows on his knees. “You were actually better off without me back then, you know?” My brows dip, and he elaborates, “That black hole I went down? I wouldn’t have wanted to have dragged you down with me.”

“So, you’re saying I dodged a bullet?” I ask with a touch of sarcasm. I would like to think I’m smarter than that, even after I messed up that one night.

“Probably.” He grimaces. “Or I might have been that loser friend who always needs bailing out.” After a shake of his head, he adds, “I often wonder what it would be like if things went differently back then. College was brutal. I mean, I was already on my way down, but with Jennifer’s fucking loser friends . . . I didn’t last long.”

I drink some of my coffee, then stare down at my mug, thinking about those guys and what it would have been like if I went to college. I remember worrying about the fact I hadn’t told him I wasn’t going, but it seems so trivial now.

“So, how was the last four years for you?”

I huff at the question. Sienna had asked something similar when she first came to my house the other day, and I got angry at her. But I do find that I’m in a different mindset today, more open and willing to talk, I guess.

Still, how do you sum up four years of your life?

With my lips twisted in thought, I break it down to a handful of things. “Had depression. Got a job in construction and moved here. Adi was born. Fatherhood. Not much else.”

He nods slowly, then drops his gaze to Adi before glancing around the room and bringing his eyes back to me. “But you’re doing all right now?”

“Yeah.”

After a moment of silence, he says, “I really am sorry for everything.”

My head dips with a nod and I sip my coffee. I do believe he is sorry, but I guess it all depends on what I’m willing to do with that apology.

...

Sienna: Have you taken Adi on any trips?

Neilix: No, but Navi and her parents have. I’m still a homebody.

Neilix: Have you been anywhere?

Sienna: Sarah and I went to New York last year for a few days. That’s about it. I’m starting to think I’m a homebody, too.

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

Sienna

My best friend, Sarah, dumps all her bags from our shopping trip into the back seat of her car, smoothing a hand through her raven locks to push them over her shoulder. “I can’t believe you only ended up with two things after everything we tried on. And surprise, surprise, one was the sunflower dress.”

Once a month, I get an extra day off during the week. Sarah already had the day off, so we decided to come shopping in the city.

I slide my purse over my shoulder. “Well, if you’re serious about moving to the city, I want to have some money put aside for that.”

Sarah sighs dramatically, leaning against her car. “I guess you’re right. So why did we bring two cars instead of saving gas?”

“Because,” I say, squishing in beside her and bumping her hip, “I’m going to go see Jason after this, and you have a date.”

“Ah, yes,” she replies with a hum. But then, as if a thought just sprung to her mind, she leans forward and angles her head toward me, her hazel eyes scrutinizing my face before they widen excitedly. “Wait just a second. You’re going to go see Neilix, aren’t you?”

Sarah witnessed my crush for all those years, and subsequently, my heartbreak, so of course, I told her I went to see him the other week, and that we’ve been in contact since. With her best friend status, she’s been privy to some information—mostly after the fallout when I was angry and didn’t care—and part of that information was his full name.

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