Page 45 of It Must Be Love

"Regardless of how you feel, I don't love you enough to marry you." I hated saying these words, but we'd been here before, and I knew she'd keep pushing me until she could break me into saying, fine, let's stay together. Not this time.

I was an idiot for starting up with her this time because I knew it would end like this. Or at least I should've known. I didn't want her to live with me. I didn't want her to stay every night with me. I didn't want to discuss how I really felt with her because I didn't want the drama. The truth was that I wasn't in a relationship with Ann—it was a dalliance at best.

"Amias, don't do this. We love each other."

"Ann, get a grip. We were dating for six fucking months this time around, and we weren't together for years in between. We don't have some long fucking love story."

"I never stopped loving you. I let you go each time so you could go sow your wild oats but I'm thirty-five now and it's time to settle down, Amias."

"Not with you, Ann, I'm sorry."

She raised her hand to hit me again, but I caught her wrist and held it away from me. "I told you, you don't want to do that again."

She wriggled her wrist, and I released her. "You're an asshole, Amias."

"You should be happy then that we're breaking up. Oh, and in case it's not clear, Switzerland is canceled for Christmas. Let Nolan and Kara know as well. Since you invited them without consulting me."

"Your mother wants us there, asshole. So, we'll be there. There's nothing you can do about it."

I felt bad for Ann because she thought she wielded more power than she had.

"Then you're free to talk to her about it. I'll be telling her shortly that you and I are not together."

I didn't add that the only interest Vivianne Westbrook had in Ann was to see her as my wife. She wouldn't care who I replaced Ann with as long as she came with the same or better family pedigree.

I walked out of her apartment then for what I knew was the last time. There would be no going back after this. Thank fuck!

Chapter 17

Naya

As these things happened, my fun Christmas with Darren turned into a non-event because Darren and three of his buddies, who'd gone to Las Vegas for some R&R, came back with COVID.

"How bad is it?" I asked Darren on the phone.

"I think I want to die," he admitted weakly.

"Can I get you anything?"

"Don't you dare come around here. We have food. We have water. We have access to a pharmacy. I hate my life."

"Did you all get a lap dance from the same stripper?"

I heard him laugh and then burst into a coughing fit that sounded extremely painful. "Oh, Darren, I hate this for you."

"I hate that you're alone for Christmas, Sparky."

"We'll make up for it…if you test negative by New Year's Eve," I offered.

"I want to die," I heard one of his friends, a big former linebacker who could still bench press two twenty, whimper.

"Are you all at your place?"

"Yeah, we're COVID central here. We're keeping DoorDash busy."

"Hey, Sparky, will you drop off some of your Christmas cookies?" another one of his friends shouted. "My wife is pissed with me and won't give me any."

"You leave them at the door," Darren instructed.