Page 67 of Lillian

Her cheeks and nose, both still rosy, were lit up by the bright phone screen. It was mid-day, but with the blinds drawn, hardly any light filtered through the window. Both Lil and I asked if Grace wanted to do anything fun today: bowling, board games, at home karaoke. All we got was a shake of her little head.

Instead, we coaxed her out to the living room, threw on the firstDisneyshort series we saw, and all sat together on the couch for the rest of the day. It gave me time to pull out my laptop and get some work done. Lil was on her phone a lot of the day, too, with Grace’s head in her lap and stroking her hair back.

After I finish work, my stomach grumbles. With a glance at the time on my laptop, I realize it’s close to six, and we haven’t eaten in a while. The laptop makes a soft thump on the sectional as I toss it aside, but Lil still doesn’t look up from her phone.

“Hey.” I nudge her with my foot. “Anything important?”

The exhaustion in her face tugs at my heart. Like someone reaching into my chest and trying to pull it clean out.

“Just texting my sister about stuff the lawyer said,” her words are distracted.

“Like what?” We haven’t done much talking about how things are going with the lawyer I chose. I hope that means she likes him, or that she would have told me if she didn’t, so I could find a new one. Maybe get other recommendations from my friends.

“The little stuff. Silly things, but Jim is saying he’s wasting time on them when he should be helping Grace,” Lil explains. She sets the phone down and gives me her full attention. “You’re a lawyer. How important is the way I dress or wear my makeup? He said not to use my phone while we wait. Why would a judge care about that? My being a good mom to Grace should be what matters.” The way she fiddles with her fingers after she finishes talking is her nervous tell.

“It matters. Granted, in my job I’m almost never in court, but everything matters when you do. The first thing a judge will see about you is how young you are. A good lawyer will say you’re too young to properly care for a child. Minimal makeup, hair up, smart clothes, all help make you appear older. More mature, capable of raising a toddler. Courtrooms are also not what they’re like on TV. You’re going to be in a room with other people, hearing other cases. You don’t want to be on your phone, to appear at all distracted or distract other people. I’m sure he told you all the basics. Be respectful, answer the judge’s questions clearly, don’t get overly emotional, those things?” The last bit is more of a question to see if the man I hired for her is on top of things. It’s still almost two weeks out, but better to be over prepared than underprepared.

She nods.

“Good. It sounds like he knows what he’s doing. Are you happy with him? Aside from whatJimsays, I mean.” I try to keep the sarcasm out of my voice, I really do. But I guess his frosty reception when I met him still rubs on me.

It makes Lillian grin. “What’s that tone for?” she goads. “This isn’t because he didn’t immediately become your best bro, is it?”

I huff. “Don’t be ridiculous. I don’t need a best bro. I’ve gotbros.”

“Oh, sure. Those four meatheads from your office you mean?” Maybe I should be offended…but they really are meatheads.

“No,” I lie automatically, not wanting her to be right. “Other meatheads.”

She laughs back at me, and I can’t help my own small smile. When she stops, she looks at me with a twinkle in her gorgeous eyes and says, “Jim will come around. He’s just gotta spend some time getting to know you. Besides,Ilike you. Is that not enough?”

This feels like a trap. While I’m silent, thinking through the correct response, she snorts. “I’m kidding. I’ll be your bro, and Jim will come around soon; then he’ll be your bro, too. And yes, I like my new lawyer.”

My cheeks hurt from smiling so much. “My bro, huh?”

Before I get to tease her anymore or tell her I certainly can’t bend my ‘bro’ over the kitchen island, Grace lets out a few wet sounding coughs. We both stop talking to look at her, but she’s sound asleep.

“She never sleeps this much. It’s been almost half the day,” Lil sighs. “I don’t want to wake her up, but she’s due for more medicine and really should eat and drink something.”

“We should, too, honestly. None of us have eaten much today.”

“To be honest, your dad pretty much ruined any appetite I had,” she says sullenly.

“He does have that effect on people,” I agree. “I’m sorry you had to hear that.”

The shrug I get back is entirely unconvincing. Something is still bugging her. Something about my dad, no doubt.

“What he said…” she starts.

I cut her off. “Was uncalled for. And hateful and–”

“Not entirely untrue,” she whispers in a sad voice, cutting me off this time.

I flinch back. “What? Nothing that asshole said is even remotely true.”

“Lincoln…”

“Lillian,” I mock in the same tone, having none of this.

---