Page 51 of Heartless

“Well, I put my feelings aside to help Jose through that dark time. Manny and I are still friends, and he and Jose are working on their relationship.”

“You’re a very lovely woman, Sharla, and I think Manny was a fool to give up what may have been the best thing that happened to him.”

Sharla shakes her head and turns her lips down. “He seems happy.”

“Maybe so, but he may have regretted it somewhere along the way.”

“He’s tried to come back a couple of times throughout the years, but I know that it wasn’t meant to be for us. Life’s too short to waste on a person that you know wasn’t meant for you. I’d rather live my life by my terms and have fun while I can,” she says before sipping her coffee.

“Besides, the single life ain’t all that bad. If I was married, I doubt that I’d have the freedom and flexibility to work as late as I always do,” she says.

She’s right. If the roles were reversed, I would have an issue with MJ being in the same situation that I’m in.

I work late most nights, and Sharla is always designated to be on the team of people that I’m working with.

And somehow, it always ends up being the two of us who are the last to leave.

Nothing is said, and nothing has happened yet. The telltale signs are in the subtle glances we give one another, the smiles that we exchange, and the way that my pulse jumps whenever she comes close to me or our hands touch when we exchange a file.

I feel the storm brewing.

13 – MEADOW

“Hey,” Onyx says, stepping into the kitchen. “Smells good. What’re you cooking?”

“Um, garlic butter steak and potatoes, roasted asparagus, and honey-glazed carrots.”

“I’m starving. How long until dinner?” Onyx asks.

“It should be ready in fifteen minutes.”

“Good. I’ve got time to shower, and by the time I’m back down, will my plate be ready?”

“Mm-hmm,” I mumble thankful that we’re not arguing and he’s now leaving the kitchen.

The only thing that I seem to want to do anymore is cook and clean my home. I don’t enjoy shopping, date nights, or even going out with the ladies. Any time I leave home, I’m always looking over my shoulder, wondering if Jesse is lurking there or will jump out of some alley. It’s easier to stay here locked behind our doors.

Onyx upgraded our security system, so that makes me feel a little better.

I want to be left alone with my thoughts, my tears, my pain, and my frustration. I don’t want anyone to tell me how I need to be or encourage me to find happiness. I’m okay when it’s just me and my thoughts.

Maybe that’s the clinical definition of depression, I don’t know. But if I am, then so be it.

I busy myself preparing our plates and drinks and have them at the table by the time he returns.

After we say our grace, he tucks into his meal with his head down, and his eyes focused on the plate before him.

“How was your day?” I ask, trying to generate conversation.

“It was good. You?” Onyx asks.

“Just cleaning and cooking.”

“Did you go into the studio today?” he asks. “Getting out of the house will do you some good.”

I stiffen up, preparing for his rebuke over my next words.

“No. I wasn’t in the mood.”

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