Page 52 of Set Fire to This Cardhouse

“Sounds like I’d like him.”

“You would.”

“He that Mike guy Haley met?” Matt asks, and of course he would have taken note of that. Toby sips at his beer before he replies.

“The very same.”

“She liked him.” Matt gives Toby a thoughtful look. “So. If he’s your work partner, he’s already in on the secret, and it’s clearly not a problem. What is it, then? He not into cock?”

Trust Matt to take the direct rather than the scenic route. Toby shakes his head. “You realize that your daughter’s in the next room, right?”

“I want her to be prepared for life. Better she learns early on that it’s not the stork that brings the babies, and that yes, you can get pregnant on the first try.” There’s no bitterness in Matt’s voice—as young as he’d been, it had taken one look at his baby daughter, and he’d been a goner. Like everyone, he has regrets, but Haley isn’t one.

“True words,” Toby allows. Chuckling a little, he lowers his gaze to the label on the bottle, poking at one of the corners. “And no, Mike’s interested; that’s not the problem. I just don’t think he gets in over his head like I do, and also, we work together. I’m good at what I do, Matt. He’s a distraction.”

“Huh.” Matt processes that, then comes to a conclusion. “You’re a coward.”

Toby glances up sharply. “Funny. That’s what he said.”

“I would like him,” Matt decides.

Lifting the bottle to his mouth, Toby takes a long gulp, the beer sliding down smoothly, settling in his stomach in a puddle of ice that melts slowly, spreads through his body. “It doesn’t matter.”

It doesn’t: with where they stand, Mike’s offer of helping him organize a trip to Hawaii is definitely off the table.

“It should matter,” Matt says. “And Haley’s a good judge of character.”

“Drop it,” Toby tells him. When Matt draws a breath to argue, Toby reaches out to poke him in the stomach. “I mean it. Drop it.”

“Why?” Matt asks.

“Because I’ve made my decision, and it’s a good one.”

It is. Mike got too close already, in just the short amount of time they spent together—Toby’s had his heart dragged through the sewers once, and he’s not going to give that kind of power to a guy who doesn’t do relationships. It won’t be worth it.

Matt looks like he’s ready to argue, though.

“Princess!” Toby calls. “I kind of feel like a movie this afternoon. D’you want to pick a film?”

“I know what you’re doing,” Matt murmurs.

Toby toasts him with his beer, and then Hailey is there, grinning, her pigtails bouncing as she throws herself onto the couch between them. Toby loves her so much, loves Matt quite a lot too, even though he’s not about to tell him that anytime soon.

It’s enough.

***

Toby sees Mike precisely three times in the following week.

Once is at the debriefing with Liu that is kept strictly professional, no mention of unscheduled trips to Costa Rica, with Mike leaving as soon as they’re done.

The second time is when Toby enters the basement locker room for a morning workout, running a few minutes earlier than his usual 6:30 a.m. slot. Mike is just about to leave, already showered and back into his semi-appropriate office attire. He moves past Toby with a vague nod.

The third time is when Toby is chatting with Jesy, discussing the date of their squash rematch in between comparing stories about instructors they both had. Mike enters the building just as Toby pretends to polish a bald head while reciting Peppy’s favorite sentence, Never trust a story you didn’t fabricate yourself. Their gazes tangle briefly before Mike continues on with a nod, his distant smile mostly directed at Jesy.

“Is he all right?” Jesy asks as soon as Mike is out of hearing range.

Toby sways his head. “How would I know?” he asks, trying his best to ignore the sad twist in his gut.

---