Page 43 of One More Time

That caught me off guard. “I can’t really teach you…”

“I don’t need you to teach me how to…” He shook off the thought. “That’s not why I look up to you. I look up to you because you’re out there living your dream. Because one day, I know you will be cheering me on when I am winning fights around the world. You’re my role model because you’re my big brother. I’m sorry for what I said…”

“Don’t be, you were right. I’ve been trying to fill a space that I never can.”

“You may not be Dad, Ty. But I didn’t realize how much you truly protected me until you were gone. There are days I feel bad because I want you to give it all up and come home.”

My heart shattered so fiercely that I was surprised I couldn’t hear it. “And if you say the word I’ll be on the next flight home.”

“That’s not what I want. I want you to fulfill your dreams. It’s what Mum wants—it’s what Dad would have wanted.”

I nodded back to him. “I wish I could be in two places at once, James. I really do.”

A sad smile graced his lips, and I watched as Holden’s bedroom light flicked on to reveal his glossy eyes.

“Yeah, me too. But we’ll see you at Christmas.”

A hum escaped me, a subtle acknowledgment fueled by a gut feeling that I wouldn’t be seeing them as planned. We planned for them to fly out to me, but I had a feeling they were keeping the severity of Mum’s condition under wraps.

“Yeah, can’t wait,” I responded with forced enthusiasm, masking the unease that lurked beneath the surface. I redirected the conversation, losing myself in his stories about training and his upcoming fight. Holden’s assistance with his grades became a focal point— a welcome relief, given his perennial struggle to concentrate in class. Though when the conversation shifted to his friends, a palpable frustration emerged. They were forging new connections, moving on, and leaving him behind. The timing stung. He was in a place where he needed his friends the most.

When there was another beat of silence, Jamie surprised me. “You know, you should really see where it goes with your guy. We both know life is too short.”

“He’s my teammate,”

His eyes went wide. “Did you know he was your teammate before it started?”

I looked away to hide the flush creeping over my cheeks and he burst into laughter. “What is so funny?”

“My perfect brother fucked up by fucking his own teammate!”

“Aye, I’m not perfect!”

“You try to be. This is too good. Like bad if you guys get caught, but kind of funny to see you do something you shouldn’t, literally.”

“Ha-Ha, laugh it out, its over.”

“Sure—let me guess who it is!”

Despite everything, I couldn’t help but share a laugh with him, playing along as he speculated with a finger to his mouth about who it could be.

“It’s one hundred percent Hunter Graves. The tall, dark, and dangerous type. Also, I’ve watched the tapes you’ve sent me; you two are too in sync not to be sleeping with each other.”

I only responded with a playful eyeroll. “On that note, I’m going to bed.”

“I was so right, wasn’t I?”

“Goodnight, smartass. I love you.”

“Love you too.”

That conversation finally lifted the weight off my chest. Almost on cue, my stomach rumbled—loudly. I tried to remember the last time I ate—and I couldn’t. I’d somehow played a hockey game on an empty stomach. I needed to refuel, and fast. As I went into the kitchen, I mentally calculated the calories burned and tried to figure out what I needed to replenish.

Cal’s voice broke through my thoughts as I cooked. “Hey, how’s things at home?”

I flipped the chicken breast on the skillet and faced Cal, noting the hesitance in his pose. “I can’t speak for Mum, but Jamie’s home. We’re better, I think.”

“Ty, I’m so sorry, really. I’ll do better. I don’t know why I can’t keep my mouth shut sometimes.”

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