Page 107 of The Waiting Game

Somehow, Felix made it through his postgame routine, cooling down, fueling his body, cleaning up.

He yelled along with the other guys as they whooped it up on the bus to the hotel but when he reached the lobby, he hesitated rather than follow guys upstairs for postgame celebrations of cards or video games.

He pulled up some info on his phone, searching for the right location and time. Yes, he’d just make it if he hurried.

“You okay?” Jonah asked, pressing a palm to Felix’s back.

“Yeah, I think I better go to an AA meeting tonight though,” Felix admitted. He was amped up, the adrenaline still coursing through his body. The urge to drink after a win wasn’t as strong as it was after a loss. But he wanted to be careful.

And he needed some time to clear his head.

Thoughts of Jonah were swirling in his brain and he was afraid he’d do something rash if he didn’t clear his mind. He needed to take it slow. Focus on what he and Ismael had discussed.

Jonah nodded, studying his face. “You sure?”

“Yeah,” Felix said. “I’m just trying to play it smart.”

Jonah’s expression softened and he slid his hand to Felix’s arm, squeezing it. “I’m proud of you, you know that, right?”

“Yeah, I do.” Felix smiled at him. “See you in a couple of hours?”

“See you then.”

With one last squeeze, Jonah headed for the elevators and Felix turned away to find his coach. He spotted him in the lobby speaking to Kate, who was busy on her phone.

“Casey?” he said. “Sorry to interrupt but you do have a sec?”

He nodded at Kate, who gave him a small nod back then returned her attention to her phone.

“Sure. What do you need, Haler?” Casey studied his face.

“I’d like to head to an AA meeting now. It’s only about ten minutes from here and I’ll grab a rideshare. I just wanted to let you know where I was heading. I didn’t want you to think I was out doing something stupid or anything.”

He flashed the screen with the meeting info at Casey who studied it for a brief moment, then nodded.

“Of course. Just text me when you get in so I don’t wait up all night worrying.”

Felix grinned. “Thanks, Dad.”

Casey chuckled. “Get out of here, then. And, hey, that’s a good choice you’re making right now. I hope you know that.”

“Thanks.” Felix ducked his head. He was still a little embarrassed about all the praise.

“Good night, Felix,” Kate murmured. “And Casey is right. We’re all proud of you.”

He gave her a tight smile and nod. It felt strange to have people be so openly proud of him for making the right choices when he’d so obviously made the wrong ones not so long ago.

He respected both Coach Casey and Kate Foster and their approval felt good but he hated people knowing his weaknesses.

Hated when he let them down.

Hated that he couldn’t be sure he wouldn’t do it again.

Felix made it to the AA meeting a few minutes after it started and he slid into a seat at the back, trying not to disturb anyone.

The familiarity of the smell of the cheap, bitter coffee and the sound of the quiet, earnest speeches people gave did help settle him though. No matter what city Felix was in, no matter where he was, he found a meeting. He found people who understood what he was going through.

At first, he’d rebelled at the thought of needing this support. At admitting he was the same as every other person who battled addiction. That he was no better.

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