Page 23 of If Only You Hurt

She glides her fingers across my skin, the ink below feeling like it’s on fire.

“Grant, when did you do this?” She’s not referring to the matching tattoo we share but to the part I added not long ago.

“I did it last year. Do you like it? Are you mad?” I can hear the nerves push through as I speak. I feel like everything moving forward depends on how she responds to what I’ve done.

“It’s beautiful. Whose is it?” She’s still running her fingers across my chest, and I can’t help myself from covering her hand with mine.

I pull her hand off my body and kiss the inside of her palm before returning it back to the tattoo she’s staring at.

“It’s yours. I wanted your heart beating next to mine,” I say to her, still tentative, as I let this secret out into the open for her to absorb.

I kept the tattoo we got together intact, but I added something to it. The artist did a seamless job of incorporating a heartbeat, the EKG strip, of Laney’s heartbeat. I had snapped a photo when she was sleeping in the hospital back in Wyoming years ago. I don’t know what made me do it.

For years, I stared at the photo, reminding myself that she was alive and that her heart still beat, even from across the world, when I couldn’t feel her warmth for myself. But then I had the idea to put the waves of her heartbeat onto my skin. As my sister likes to correct me, it’s the beating of the chambers of the heart. My sister, ever the romantic, ladies and gentlemen.

It’s Laney’s heartbeat, the one that took my breath away years ago while she lay in that hospital bed, full of life yet a shell of who she had grown to be at that point in time. I needed a constant, permanent reminder that she was okay. When she was living, I was living. That’s what I told myself each time I had to walk away from her.

I wish I could read her thoughts at this moment. I can’t tell if this is pulling her further from me or if she’s feeling more connected to me. This discovery could either pull us closer together or wreck us. I should have thought this through. I’m about to say something when she finally speaks.

“I love you, Grant. I never stopped loving you.” Then she kisses me again, this time softly against my lips. I bring my hands to cup her face, my fingers into her hair, deepening the connection between us.

I move her onto her back and start to unbutton her shirt, slowly revealing the best gift I was ever granted access to in my past. The moment her skin is exposed on her chest, I kiss her directly over her heart, and I can see the goosebumps erupt along her skin. I move toward each breast, giving each one the attention it craves. I pull down her bra and expose her left breast, nibbling the skin and sucking on her nipple. She arches her back, her reaction spurring me on.

I continue my descent and unbutton her jean shorts. I look up at her, and our gazes lock in that moment in time. She seems to read my thoughts and gives me a little nod. I shimmy her shorts down, bringing her panties along with them. I throw the garments behind me and look at the beauty that is Laney James. She’s perfection, and I don’t know what I’ve done in this life, or maybe in past ones, that has gifted me with this perfect creature.

This is love. This is completion. She is everything I’ve looked for in life. I have traveled to the ends of the earth, and I still haven’t found a woman like her. She is my beginning and my end. She is my past, my present, and my future.

I kiss along the inside of her knee, moving along the inner portions of her thigh, my movements aimed at one spot and one spot only. She’s so wet for me, and I greedily take what is right in front of me.

I swipe my tongue along her folds, and she moans while I feel her fingers move through my hair. The sound is music to my ears, the bite of her pulling on my hair causing me to lose a bit of control, and it gives me the confidence to keep going.

I let my tongue move along, stimulating that little nub. I move one of my hands up her leg, and I insert one finger, followed by another. I continue to fuck her with my mouth while I let my fingers reach into that secret spot where I know I’ll have her screaming my name. Soon, I feel her constrict my fingers, and the satisfaction that I have done this to her spurs me on to see her explode. She’s riding my face, saying my name, and my dick is about to combust.

She finally lets go, and she rides her climax until she comes off her high. A satisfied smile crosses her features, and she’s still panting from that ride.

I move up her body until I’m hovering over her, my clothes still completely intact below my waist. She seems to notice this and begins to unbuckle my belt, and then I feel her tug until my clothes are falling to the floor. I help her out and remove my boxers while she fully undresses from her open shirt and unbuckled bra.

We are now completely naked, and she seems to be taking me in. I know that my daily movements have added some muscles. I’m still lean, but I have added some definition to my physique. It’s nice to know she has noticed. From the look she’s giving me, I can tell she likes the view.

“Hey now, Bean, if you keep looking at me like that, I may not get much further without making a fool of myself,” I smirk.

She laughs, and it continues to be one of my favorite sounds from her mouth.

“We can’t have any of that, Grantie.” She winks back, and fuck if that’s not a turn-on.

I move over her, my dick at attention and begging for some contact. It’s when I look down that I notice I didn’t grab a condom. I’m about to move away when I feel her legs wrap around me and tighten.

“No, don’t go. I’m clean.” It’s the first time I realize she’s scared of losing this connection. It’s the last fucking thing I want.

I let my head fall forward and take a deep breath. “You sure? I promise I’m clean.”

She nods and uses her legs to pull my hips closer to her. The moment my dick feels the slickness in her folds, I nearly come on the spot. Fuck, I forgot how perfect she is. I haven’t even slid inside her, and I already know I will never be able to walk away from her, from our connection, again. I can’t fuck this up.

I slowly begin to inch forward until my mushroom head is inside the one place I have been dying to be. I’m taking deep breaths in and out through my nose. I have to stay composed.

She moves her hands down and grabs my ass, urging me to move further into her. Soon, I’m fully seated, and fuck if this isn't nirvana. The fullness makes her moan, and she arches her back. I pull out and slowly glide back in. Her moan only gets louder, and I feel like all the little moments of my past have led me back to her.

I’m pumping in and out of her, our moans and our skin slapping the only sounds in the room. Seeing her gaze on me fuels me to keep going. She keeps telling me what she wants, and I’m quick to obey. I put my thumb against her clit, and she detonates around me. I feel her strangling my cock, and it’s taking everything in me not to fall right off that cliff with her. But I don’t want this to end. I don’t want to leave this perfection and possibly face the repercussions of our actions if she regrets it.

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