Page 80 of Edge of Desire

P: It’s more than ok.

A: See you in a minute.

With heart pounding, I pushed the button to the elevator and waited for the doors to open.

Twenty-Four

Preston

My arrival in Vail coincided with her friend Melissa’s. That worked to my advantage because it gave me the extra time I needed to get my head on straight.

The time I spent on the ski slopes was trying to keep up with the girl. Justin had told me she was an expert skier, but I never imagined she’d be as excellent as this. I would catch glimpses of her every now and then, but I gave up trying to follow her after the first day. It was a waste of time, not to mention a hazard to my health.

Avery’s description of Melissa was dead on. It would’ve been impossible not to recognize her, except I wasn’t expecting someone quite that flashy. Melissa loved the attention and made sure she got it everywhere she went. I could sense it made Avery uncomfortable, because that wasn’t her style, but it was apparent she was happy to have Melissa here, so she dealt with it just fine. It was hard not to stare at Melissa as she sailed down the ski slopes. Bright red frizzy hair, partially tucked beneath a red helmet, lips lined in shiny red gloss, and wearing the brightest pink ski outfit I’d ever seen, she was quite the spectacle.Skiers would abruptly halt to watch her as she gracefully soared by, screeching and laughing at the top of her lungs. It was truly a sight to behold, and one I’ll never forget.

I tried to stay away from Avery’s studio, I really did, but one day, I couldn’t help myself. It was late afternoon, and after I’d watched her and Melissa head off to Tres Chicas with those ski instructors, I walked over there. I figured I had enough time to get in and out, but when I entered the apartment, I sensed her everywhere. Her scent enveloped me, and I could almost touch her, making me want to stay forever. Looking at her things, seeing how and where she lived every day, where she slept, made my heart pound.

Melissa’s suitcase and clothes were piled in the corner and the place was sort of a wreck. It looked like they had left in a hurry that morning. I walked over to the kitchen table where an open box sat. Deciding to snoop, I checked out the contents and chuckled. Inside were all sorts of sex toys, but the one on top caught my eye. It was a neon pink vibrator, but that wasn’t what had captured my attention. The fact that my name was written on it did. Had she been using that thing and thinking of me? I hoped like hell she had because she’d been stuck on my mind like a strip of duct tape.

I moved to her bed and ran my hand across it. When I got to her pillow, I couldn’t stop myself from picking it up and holding it against my face, aching to feel close to her. That’s when I saw it. It had been hiding under her pillow. I didn’t know what it was at first, so I picked it up and smiled for the first time in I don’t know how long. She slept with my shirt beneath her pillow. It was my favorite black t-shirt, the one I’d been missing forever. She’d taken it!

I must’ve stood there for quite some time, because I suddenly realized it had grown quite dark. Voices drifted up to me and my senses were alerted. It was time to get the hell out of here and fast. Moving quickly, I slipped out the door, locking it behind me. I didn’t want her to know anyone had been there. Still wearing my helmet, I was unrecognizable. I passed her on the street right outside her place. That had been way too close for comfort. As I thought back, I realized I’d left that damn t-shirt lying on the bed, instead of placing it back under her pillow. I prayed she wasn’t perceptive enough to notice. Knowing Avery though, she’d pick up on it right away. Dammit! I should never have gone in there. But then I grinned. Hell no! I wouldn’t have missed seeing that for anything.

When Avery’s text came in, my heart stopped. Her gifts had been delivered hours ago, but I didn’t know what time she got off work, so I wasn’t sure if I’d hear from her or not. I had zero expectations. I refused to set myself up for disappointment.

The light tap on the door indicated she was on the other side of that barrier. My hands turned clammy. What if she came here to tell me we were through for good? That the presents were nice, but we were done? It was something I’d prepared for but didn’t want to accept.She tapped again, so I pulled the door open, and could barely breathe, just looking at her.

“Hi,” she said.

“Hello to you,” I said back, moving aside to let her in.

She stood there for a second before I remembered myself. “May I take your coat?”

“That would be great. Thanks.”

Score one for Preston. I took her coat. That meant she was going to stay at least for a few minutes.

“Can I get you something to drink?”

“Um, no, I’m good.”

She looked so beautiful, I automatically reached out my hand to brush her hair off her cheek, and as I touched her, I realized what I was doing. I gave my head a vigorous shake. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to do that. I guess I ...”

“It’s okay.”

We both fell silent for a few moments and then I said, “You look incredible, Avery. Then again, you always look perfect.”

“Preston, I ...”

“Before you say anything, can I say something?”

She nodded. I had to get this out before I lost my nerve or before she turned around and left. So, the words gushed out.

“You need to know this. I was a fool. A complete and total fool, but even worse than that, I was a fucking dick to you. I’ve replayed the whole situation over and over in my mind, countless times, and I was such a damn ass, a jerk, and I fucked you over so completely. My selfishness got in the way, and I worried about losing you, which led to a total disregard for your feelings, not to mention what I did to your life.” I couldn’t stand still as I spoke, so I paced in front of her, my hands tearing through my hair or rubbing my face. “I put myself—my feelings—above everything and didn’t consider the consequences of my actions. Somehow, and I don’t know how, I thought they’d iron themselves out. Then I got too deep to even utter a word. Obviously, that was ridiculously moronic and so terribly wrong, which brings me back to the fact that I was a damn fool. I’m sorrier than I can ever say on every level possible, but mostly because I hurt you so deeply. I will regret that for the rest of my life.I know forgiveness is far too much to ask, but if perhaps you could find it in your heart to accept that I am fucked up, maybe we can try again. I don’t know, Avery. Just tell me something, because my life is worthless without you as a part of it.”

She looked at me for the longest time and then walked to me and hugged me. When I felt her arms go around me, I knew the greatest joy in my life. She pressed her cheek against my chest, and I fell to my knees and buried my face against her as I held her. My hopes began to rise when her hands moved through my hair, and she pressed my head against her. I looked up at her, rose to my feet, picked up her hand, and placed it against my heart. Then she finally spoke.

“I’ve been unhappy since I left you. But I can’t be with someone who isn’t honest with me. Honesty and trust go hand in hand. If I can’t trust you, we can’t have a relationship. When I found out what you did, it hurt. No, it was much deeper than hurt. I didn’t know what to do and that’s why I ran. I had to get away from you to think clearly. Being around you clouds my head, and I can’t think straight. I had to leave and think about us and where we stood.”

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