Page 42 of Edge of Desire

He looked into my eyes, searching for something.

“You can always touch me. You don’t have to ask.”

“But I thought ... well, you know earlier when I ...”

“You caught me by surprise. If I know you’re there, it’s all good.” He brushed his hand through my hair, letting his fingers glide through. “You have the softest hair.”

I smiled. He was always saying the nicest things to me. I ran my hand along his arm, from shoulder to wrist. He was hard and muscular. I knew he was well formed, perfect in every way. I wanted to feel his skin so badly it was hard not to pull his shirt off. My hand slid to his neck, and I cupped it as I leaned into him, pressing my head next to his heart. It thrummed against my ear and its rhythm gave me comfort. His arms held me tightly and we sat together like that, unmoving, for some time.

I eventually lifted my head and told him, “Someday, Preston, I’m going to make love to you with my whole body.” His eyes widened, but I didn’t give him a chance to respond. I unhooked my legs from his and stood to clear our bowls, putting them in the dishwasher. He sat there and watched. When I was finished cleaning everything, I walked up to him and held his face in my hands, kissed him on the lips, and then said, “I’m very sleepy, so I’m going to bed. Good night, Preston. Thank you for a lovely dinner.”

Turning away from him, I headed up the stairs. His eyes burned into me the whole way as I high-fived myself the entire march up the steps.

As I lay in bed, I couldn’t get my mind off everything. Preston had been through hell and how could I not admire him for everything he had done? He’d given up his life for his job. It pissed me off that it destroyed his family, but those people he worked for let it happen. They saw his life unraveling and had done nothing about it. What kind of people did that? Were they so focused on their own goals that they missed what was happening to their people’s lives? That was scary.

Preston’s prison sentence was insane. It was one thing to go through that because you were stupid enough to have committed the crime to begin with. But to go to prison because it’s part of your cover? Again, what kind of people let their employees do this?

My stomach hurt just thinking about it. But the most painful of it all was that Preston didn’t think he was worthy of anyone because of it. That was just bullshit too. I felt my blood boil when I thought about it.

I got out of bed and started pacing. It was all so damn unfair. He had done it all to help our country get rid of the drugs coming in, but the price he had paid was much more than he bargained for.

Looking at the clock I saw it was one in the morning. I would never sleep now, as worked up as I was over this. There was only one thing I could do, and had to do it before I lost my nerve.

I walked across the hall and opened Preston’s door. I didn’t want to startle him. The last thing I wanted was to feel a choke hold again.

“Preston,” I called out in a quiet voice. “Are you sleeping?”

“No, are you okay?” I detected concern in his tone.

“I’m fine, but can I get in bed with you?”

“Um, wait a minute.” He threw back the covers and got out of bed. The moonlight streamed in, and I peeked at his perfect naked silhouette as he stood. I wanted to fly across the room and latch on to him, but I didn’t. I grabbed the carpet with my toes and clenched them tightly to remind me to stay put. He turned around and said, “I’m sorry. I sleep nude, so I wanted to pull some boxers on.”

“Oh.” I gulped. Just the thought. Yum.

“Come on in.” He held the covers back and I climbed into his large bed.

“Are you sure it’s okay?”

“I’m sure.”

“I couldn’t sleep because I’ve been thinking.”

“About what?”

“About what you said.”

“Well, that’s a fairly broad subject since I said quite a bit about a lot of things.”

“I’ve been thinking about you.”

“I see.”

“I disagree with you.”

“Avery, you have me at a disadvantage. I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

I’d been lying on my back staring at the ceiling, so I rolled to my side and lifted to my elbow so I could see him.

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