Page 43 of Edge of Desire

“You said you were tainted and dirty. But I disagree.”

“Hmm, I see.”

“No, I don’t think you do. Preston, if that shithead Little Dickie had raped me, would you think any less of me?”

“No! How can you even ask me that?”

“Because you seem to think I should think less of you because of what you’ve been through. It’s the same thing.”

I was met with dead silence.

After a bit he finally said, “No, Avery, it’s not. I’ve chosen to be with prostitutes.”

“That’s because you don’t think you’re worthy of any other women. Am I right?”

“That’s true, but ...”

“So, if you thought you deserved other women, you would never have chosen to be with prostitutes, correct?”

“Well, of course. But ...”

“No buts. Just a yes or no will do.”

“Avery, are you a lawyer?”

“Very funny. I’m trying to explain something. You’re putting yourself in this position. Did you hear what I just said? You are putting yourself in this position. No one else is. The truth is I admire you for what you’ve done. I could kill the bastards who hurt you. Just like you said you could kill Little Dickie for hurting me. But it’s the same damn thing. You have to get over this and take the stigma of feeling not worthy off of yourself, because you are worthy. I think you’re very worthy. I know everything about you and I’m not running away. I don’t think there’s a single thing about you that’s dirty. It pains me to know how brutally you were hurt, but that’s it. I’m going to touch you now. But that’s all I’m going to do. Just touch you. I’m not even going to kiss you. I just want to touch you.”

And that’s what I did. I reached out my hand and started with his lips. My fingers traced the outline of their fullness before they moved to his brows. I smoothed the creases between his eyes away as I massaged light circles with my thumb. Then I touched his cheeks and neck. He was uncommonly beautiful, with the glow of the moon forming shadows across his face. I wanted nothing more than to kiss him but touching him seemed so much more important right now.

Scooting next to him so that our bodies touched, I let the tips of my fingers slowly walk their way over his torso, moving from top to bottom. I felt the raised surfaces of each scar as I tripped over them. I lingered on each one, memorizing their contours and trying to comprehend how painful it must have been. My eyes pooled with water as I continued my journey of getting to know Preston’s body. It seemed like when I ventured to the most sensitive areas of him, the more concentrated his scars became. The bastards knew where to hurt him the most and my heart broke for each time he was injured and the torture he experienced. A long time later, I laid my head over his chest, and hearing his heart beating against me, I drifted to sleep with my arms curled around him.

Morning came all too soon, and when I awoke, I was still wrapped around Preston like paper around a Christmas present.

“Good morning there.” His voice was even huskier than usual, making my belly tighten.

“Good morning back to you.” I didn’t want to look at his face yet. I wanted to inspect all his tattoos that I couldn’t see from the night before. They were everywhere and sexy as hell. During the night, my head had moved down to that fine sprinkling of hair that enticed me so as it trailed past the waistband of his boxers.

“You know something, Preston?”

“What’s that, honey?”

I finally raised my head and had to refrain from gasping. The man was a hundred and one ways to all kinds of sexy. His hair was messy and had that wavy thing going, and his face was covered in the perfect amount of scruff. Half-lidded golden eyes stared back at me as I swallowed a few times and then licked my lips.

“God, you're a tease.”

“Oh, I couldn’t possibly compete with you. Not even close. Here you are all twisted around me like I don’t know what, and you’re the most gorgeous thing I’ve ever seen. Your warm breath has been tickling my abs for well over an hour as I’ve just been lying here and watching you. Without a doubt, you win the tease award.”

“Nope, no contest. You don’t have a bird’s-eye view of this hot ink like I do. These are amazing.”

“You really think so?”

“Yeah, I do.”

“I’ll have to tell you what they mean someday, then, won’t I?”

I ran my hand across several and looked back at him. “I’d like that very much.”

He took my hand and laced his fingers with mine. “Come up here. You’re too far away.”