Page 41 of Knot Forgotten

CHAPTER 20

Erin

Matt and Cameron both give me concerned looks as if sleeping next to Blake is a bad idea. But I promised. So, when he links his fingers with mine, I follow on weak legs, my stomach flipping with excitement.

He lifts me up and places me on his lofted bed before shedding his clothing down to his boxers and swinging up after me. When he settles down, taking up most of the space, I watch him. How is this going to work?

“Lay over here, so I don’t knock you off the bed.” He pats the space between him and the wall, and I press my lips together before gathering my courage and climbing over him.

I’m doing this. I can feel my pulse pounding away in my neck, and it is made worse as I brush over his lap and feel his length between us. He isn’t hard, but I can feel him hardening in the split second I rest against him. Desire, sharp and needy, spears me, but I ignore it.

It is only for comfort, that is why I’m doing this. Maybe if I tell myself that enough I’ll believe it. The necklace hanging from my neck breaks that illusion for me each time it brushes my collarbone as I move. He tucks me into his side before pulling a blanket over us.

Hesitantly, I snake my arm over his bare skin and around to his other side. He lets loose a purr, a soft rumbling of his chest that makes an answering whine want to come out, but I choke it off.

Soon, Blake is snoring softly, his arm firmly around me, holding me in place. My thoughts drift back to the last time he held me like this. History repeats echoes of itself until we get it right, I guess.

“Rinny, listen to me,” Blake calls after me as I walk as quickly away from him as possible.

The dried brush on the forest floor crunch under our feet. I head for the treehouse before pivoting and taking the trail to the watering hole. I don’t have my suit on, but I don’t plan on going in the water anyway. It just soothes something inside of me to be near the small waterfall.

Matt, Riley, and Cam all want me regardless of the fact that I’ve kissed all of them. But Blake? I’m not sure that is the case, not after he was in the library with Jill Cosmos. He wants to kiss all the girls, not just me, which makes me feel a little hypocritical and squirmy in my skin. Who am I to be mad about that? I’ve kissed his three best friends and plan on doing it some more. Still, each time I think of his lips on hers, it feels as if I’m going to break in half. He is supposed to be mine. Right?

My heart feeling as if it is going to jump right out of my throat, I spin back toward him. He comes to an abrupt stop in an attempt not to collide with me. I meet his intense gray eyes, crossing my arms over my chest.

The forest quiets around us, the only sound is the waterfall hitting the small watering hole behind me.

“You’ve been avoiding me,” he whispers, breaking the silence.

I roll my lips between my teeth, trying to come up with something to say that won’t destroy our whole relationship. “I heard you. In the library.”

Well, that isn’t it. My throat feels as if it is going to close up as his face falls. He knows what I’m talking about. The day he kissed me, he also kissed Jill. Tears prickle at the back of my eyes the longer he doesn’t say anything.

He runs his fingers through his silky hair and glances away, his eyes losing focus. He inhales noisily and brings his gaze back to mine.

“I was trying to prove to myself that I was wrong about what I felt when I kissed you. I thought I ruined everything by kissing you, Rinny. It wasn’t in the plan.”

A traitorous tear slides down my cheek, and he brushes it away with his thumb.

“Don’t cry. It was stupid, and all it did was prove that you are the only one for me.”

“What was the plan, Blake?”

He shifts uncomfortably on his heels, and I hug myself tighter. “We knew you were presenting as an omega and that we were alphas. It was perfect in our minds. We could stay together forever, with you as our omega. But we were going to court you, take it slow. So me kissing you was not part of taking it slow,” he says, dragging his fingers through his hair again. “But if I had been aware Cam already kissed you…” He shakes his head, sinking his teeth into his lower lip.

“You wouldn’t have kissed Jill?”

He laughs, but it sounds like a self deprecating laugh, as he releases his lower lip. “That is the least of it. I wouldn’t have tried to pretend I didn’t kiss you. The whole school could have found out, and I would have admitted to it proudly.”

His words make me warm. A smile breaks out over my face, and he grins back at me.

“I’m sorry for hurting you,” he says, his face going sober as he captures my gaze with his.

I melt, forgiving him completely. I release my sides and glance over my shoulder at the waterfall, barely visible through the trees.

“Last one to the watering hole buys ice cream,” I say in response, and take off toward one of our favorite places.

His laugh rings out behind me, and I know we will be okay. We will work it all out. I reach the clearing first, because I am faster than all of them if given a head start. And I pull off my shirt, revealing my plain tan bra, before wiggling out of my jean shorts. I’m in my panties when he comes into the clearing, and I don’t think before I dive into the water.

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