Page 10 of Knot Forgotten

“You aren’t sorry,” I reply, making sure to look at him so he can read my lips.

He grins down at me before snagging my tray from me and leading the way to our table. Blake avoids looking at me as I slide into my seat, the metal legs scraping loudly against the tile and announcing our arrival anyway.

Cameron shoots me a smile. I haven't seen him all morning, and I'm not sure how I should respond after the kiss I shared with Blake earlier, so I duck my head after a quick hello as my face heats.

Matt snags the chocolate milk from my tray, dropping it next to his other one as Riley places the tray in front of me, but he quickly replaces it with his grape juice. I love the tart drink as much as he loves the milk. He claims he needs the protein for football practice. I just like sugar.

“Tell us again why you have to take all the smart classes?” Matt says, as he opens the first chocolate milk. “We miss you, Rinny.”

I scoff. “You four could be in the same classes. You're smart enough.”

Taking a bite of my pizza, I chew thoughtfully as Matt eyes me and shakes his head. “No time, cupcake.”

I choke on the food in my mouth, my eyes watering as I try not to die. “Cupcake?” I sputter when I can breathe again. Has he scented me? I attempt to sniff at my wrists, trying to detect even the slightest whiff of my new au natural perfume.

He shrugs and takes a large bite of his slice like he didn't just drop a bomb on top of me with the new nickname.

‘I like it,’ Riley signs, nudging my arm playfully. He brushes his chin twice signing, sweet, while Matt and Cam start laughing.

It's unfamiliar and teasing in a way I'm not used to. So, I stuff my cheeks so full I can't reply if I want to.

Blake pushes away from the table and stands. “I told Jill I'd meet her in the library.” He shrugs his backpack over his shoulder and strides away.

A sharp pang hits me, almost like the start of my heart cracking in half.

Jill Cosmos. The only girl to ever catch any of their attention besides me. But in a different way, they became interested in her once making mud cakes and playing in sprinklers became something of the past. When other girls tried to start catching their eye. She was the first. And the only one.

Just her name on his lips makes my skin uncomfortable and my appetite disappear. I drop my pizza, clearly done with it, and Matt snags it up.

“Don't waste your lunch, Rin,” he says before taking a large bite.

“I'm not. You're eating it,” I point out.

None of them mention Blake leaving or my silence, easily carrying on a conversation about one of their earlier classes. And the crazy teacher they have.

I slide my seat back over the tile floor, and they pause mid-sentence to watch me.

“Lunch isn't over yet,” Cam complains, attempting to sound natural. But I can hear the change in his voice, he's concerned.

“I'm gonna get a head start on a project.”

I don't wait for a response before turning and heading out of the lunch room. My legs feel like lead, which makes no sense. I don't have a claim on any of the guys, even if they do kiss me. Even if they feel like they are an extension of myself. Part of my very soul.

On autopilot, I make my way to the school's library.

Only realizing my mistake when I'm halfway to the back tables in the library. A giggle halts my steps. Jill Cosmos. My blood runs cold as I hear Blake’s deep rumble of a chuckle in response.

No. To whatever God or Gods there may be, please do not let them be flirting.

Why did I come here? I knew Blake was meeting Jill here. Did I want to see them together? To reassure myself that he had to meet her here for a project?

“Is that so?” Jill says, a teasing laugh coloring her words.

“That’s so.” Blake’s soft response hits me straight in the stomach like a boxer going for gold.

I can imagine what they are doing. He’s brushing her hair from her face, and she’s staring up at him, already half in love. It is pure torture to imagine.

The blood rushes from my face, and I duck my head. I don't want to see what they are doing in the stacks. I shouldn’t even be here. What am I doing?

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