Page 18 of The Last Promise You Made

What I need you to know, what I plead for you to believe, is that I love you. I will always love you. There has never been anyone else for me. Only you. And I love our child, if possible, even more.

Our precious little girl has somehow, even with our life on the run, kept your verve for life and your sense of humor. When she smiles, I see you. I hope she’s still able to smile when she finds you. I hope the black of my world hasn’t forever darkened hers.

As I write this and put the letter where only Addy knows, I am sure of one thing. I know you will protect her with every fiber, every breath in your being.

And I’m sorry to say you may have to.

I won’t say their name here in case there’s a chance to keep you both safe from them. I’ve been building something for years, before I even found you, something I hope you can trade your lives for if they do show up at your door. It’s an insurance policy of sorts. If you have Addy, you’ll have it, but don’t use it unless they come for you. It’ll be so much better for everyone if they don’t know either of you exists.

I won’t ask for your forgiveness because I understand there is no redeeming myself for any of the things I’ve done. But I know there was a time when our love meant everything to you, and I call on those feelings to be your guide as I beg you not to hold my mistakes against our daughter. Please give her freely the love you once gave me. Please let her see the Ryder Hatley I fell head over heels for. The person who allowed me to forget briefly what I’d escaped. The person who allowed me to hope for something better than the life I’d found myself living.

Sincerely, regretfully, and with all the love I still feel for you,

Ravyn

My jaw was clenched so tight I thought my teeth might crack. I balled the paper in my hand, crumpling the words that were tearing apart my walls and my scars and making them bleed fresh and new. How dare she talk of loving me! How dare she!

Fuck.

I closed my eyes, leaning back against the wall.

She’d been running. Running scared. And she hadn’t trusted me enough to tell me. Hadn’t believed we could face it together. What did that say about me? About us? Could I even believe her? She’d lied about everything before. Maybe this was just one more lie. Maybe she just needed some damn sucker to take in her child if she ended up dead because she was working with a fucking cartel. Maybe I was the only damn sucker she could think of.

And yet, that thought didn’t ring true either.

The girl…Addy…she looked a little small to be the right age. She looked like my niece, and Mila had been born a whole year after our baby would have been. But Ravyn had been small as well. She’d been over a foot shorter than me. When we’d been together, I’d loved the difference in our sizes. Loved that I could maneuver her body, set her on me, hold her up, and get lost in her fairylike quality while embedding myself in her.

A simple DNA test would show whether or not she was lying this time.

Whatever the truth, Addy had been told I was her father.

She was here, and her mother had been slaughtered.

My stomach lurched.

Had she seen it?

Had that little girl watched as someone cut open her mother?

Chapter Six

Ryder

GET OFF ON THE PAIN

Performed by Gary Allan

More pain carved its way through me at the thought of Addy watching her mother being killed. It was as if the knife that had cut Ravyn had found its way inside me, slicing away at what was left of my emotions.

What should I do?

I turned my head to find Maddox had come back. He was standing in the doorway, eyes sad instead of sparkling as they normally were. No ribbing. No teasing. Just a mirror of pain. Once upon a time, we’d commiserated over the loss of the women we loved.

He’d gotten his back, and I’d told him he’d done something I could never do…forgive.

Now I didn’t have to worry about ever getting that chance.

Ravyn was dead.

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