Page 10 of Lost In Someone

We wind each other up throughout the meal. He acts as if nothing ever happened, that I’m a new acquaintance. I can play that game too, but I want to get him alone because this isn’t over. Not in a million years.

I’m hyper-aware of how close he is. The warm, almost spicy scent of him is just as I remember. It’s as if I can taste him, and I so want to do that.

When Drew and Merrick leave to sort out Willow, Brodie gets up and follows them. Which leaves me with Merlin. He’s twirling the stem of his wine glass between his fingers and takes a deep breath.

“Are you interested in Brodie? You seem intense, both of you. Has something gone on?”

Okay, so I wasn’t as discreet as I thought. I hadn’t realised he’d been watching me. Or us. “No, it’s nothing. I needed to apologise to him. I get the feeling I’m going to say sorry to everyone in town. Do I owe you one too?”

Not likely. I did him a huge favour by being an arse. He sets his glass on the table. “No, no, I’m good. But if you’re not interested in Brodie, I’m going to ask him out.”

“I don’t think he’s into men. At least that’s what Drew said. Well, that’s what Drew believes. I’m sure Merrick has told him he was straight.”

Merlin laughs lightly. “There’s no harm in asking.”

Merrick and Drew come back into the kitchen. “Sorry about that. She’s asleep again now.”

Drew tops up our wine glasses and sits back down. “Brodie excused himself. He needed to get home.”

“What? Why?” I sit up in my chair. “He seemed fine.”

Merrick gives me a WTF look, and I settle back down. “Nothing. He has an early start tomorrow. Do I have to remind you to behave around him? He’s my best friend and is working through some issues.”

I hold my hands up. “Hey, okay, I get it.” I take another sip of my wine. How quickly can I leave? I don’t want Brodie to get too far. I need to talk to him without an audience.

Drew says something to Merrick I can’t hear, but the tension in him eases, and Merrick gives me a small smile. “Sorry, Ivan. That was uncalled for.”

“S’okay. I should probably be getting home too. It’s been a great evening. Thanks for asking me.” I stand. Merlin doesn’t seem to be in a hurry to get home, so I say goodnight to him too.

Drew follows me to the door. “Sorry, Ivan. Merrick’s a bit protective of Brodie. He won’t tell me what happened, only that it was a life changer for him. He gave up his job in late September and has been here since. He’s planning to stay and even put his house up for sale. I’ve offered him my house. I’m going to be moving in here soon enough if Merrick gets his way.”

Too many thoughts rush through my head. Brodie left his job and moved here mere weeks after our night. All because something happened and changed his life. Was that me, us, what we did? I want to race after him, but I hold back. With my collar turned up and a scarf wrapped tightly around my neck, I walk briskly down the hill.

Thank god it’s stopped raining, even if the wind is still howling around me during the fifteen-minute walk to the edge of town. The walk up the narrow lane to the cottage on the edge of the dunes is calmer. Even though the high hedgerow protects me from the worst of the biting wind, I’m cold, my ears are numb, and my fingers are frozen. All traces of the wine have gone, taking the adrenaline-fuelled need to get back to him with it. As I reach the crest of the hill and the cottage comes into view, I slow down. Light shines through the chink in the curtains from the only window at the front of the house.

After a few deep breaths, I knock softly on the door and wait. And wait. Maybe I didn’t knock loud enough, or he could be in the back. As I lift my hand again, the door swings open, and Brodie stands in the wide space, eyes flashing.

“What are you doing here? You want to laugh at me some more? Did you tell them?”

“What the fuck! How was I supposed to know it was you that night?” I snarl back, taking a step closer. Brodie doesn’t move. He’s a big guy, broader than me and probably stronger, but my job gives me all the workouts I need. I can hold my own—if I need to.

“You seemed to take a good long look back in the summer, enough to decide I was Merrick’s boyfriend. I bet you couldn’t believe your luck when you saw me in the club. Another way to hurt Merrick more than you had already.”

I step through the door and slam it shut behind me. Does he think that poorly of me? “Hey, contrary to your opinion, Merrick is not the centre of my attention. I had my own crap going on, and my best friend wasn’t there to help me because he was so wrapped up in your friend. How lucky that when you’re going through whatever shit has brought you here, your friend is here for you.”

“You’re the shit that brought me here! Have you thought of that? My fucking world changed because of that night with you.”

“Then why the fuck did you leave?” Our voices have risen to full-on shouting. I’m as furious as him now.

“Because you’re the only man I’ve been with. And how I felt about it rocked me to my core.”

His admission blows the wind out of my sails.

“What? What do you mean? How?”

He drops his head and sags like a deflated balloon. “It means exactly that. I’ve never even kissed a man before you. I always thought I was straight, and so did all my friends, including Merrick. I don’t know what it was—is—about you, but you were all I saw that night. I couldn’t have stopped myself, even if I’d wanted to. You gave me the best night of my life. I had to leave before you could ruin it by treating me as a simple hook-up.” He walks into the kitchen, but I’m rooted in place, my head reeling.

I shouldn’t believe him. No one straight kisses a man like that, gives themselves so easily, so completely. He begged me for more, for harder, for deeper, for it never to stop.

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