Page 164 of The Dawn of the Cursed Queen

His eyes widened a fraction, and his gaze focused behind me. I heard the chattering and spun, every hair on my body standing on end. A mummified body was attached to the wall, wrapped in white webbing. A beast of many legs and protected by a dark shell looked at me with all twelve of its eyes. It opened its mouth to scream, its orange and black spotted wings fanning out. A whoosh flew past me, and a silver ablaze dagger hit it square in the head. Its wings went slack and its body limp, skewered to the wall by its head.

The flames died in my hands, and the room grew dark once more. “Okay, something tells me this city isn’t abandoned but overrun with giant flesh-eating bugs, and now we have to kill them all. Great. Did I ever tell you how much I hate bugs?”

The creature’s body twitched, and I shivered. My stomach turned, and it wasn’t just because of the giant bug embedded in the wall. I was still hurt. He brought me here for this? After everything? We didn’t even talk about what happened. He just assumed we would jump into our next mission, and I couldn’t. I threw my arms up in frustration.

“Samkiel, I can’t do this. I can’t just act like nothing happened between us. You left and—”

I turned and froze, every muscle in my body seizing. It wasn’t in fear of the hundreds of flying bugs that probably infested this city, but because Samkiel, World Ender, Destruction Incarnate, and the legendary God King throughout all twelve realms, was kneeling before me. His hand was raised, and he held a shimmering silver ring that held a rhombus-cut, clear jewel. The band gleamed in the low light, and the main stone and the four smaller gems surrounding it sparkled like starlight. Power wafted from it, pure blinding power that I could nearly taste.

“W-what?” The word left my mouth in a whisper as I glanced between him and the ring. My body flushed with heat, and my heart pounded. I took a step back.

“I wanted to do this differently, but I am afraid that creature signaled more to come. There is no perfect place to do this. No place would be perfect enough for you, but anywhere you are is perfect for me.”

My brain stopped completely, unable to comprehend what was happening. The ground shook beneath us, or maybe it was me, my entire world tilting.

“This is how it is done on Onuna, yes? They get down on one knee and confess their undying love.” Worry creased his brow. “Am I doing this wrong?”

I couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think. Every form of language emptied from my brain at the sight of Samkiel kneeling before me, holding that ring out. My heart thudded in my chest, and my throat went dry.

“What is this? What’s happening?” I managed to gasp.

“Well, I believe this is the part where I ask.” His smile was so soft and so sweet. It broke my heart. “Dianna, will you—”

“No.”

Samkiel’s brows furrowed, and he stood. I backed away from the ring he held like he was offering me poison. “No?”

I shook my head. “No.”

He opened his mouth, undoubtedly to say some pretty words that I would believe, but I could not let him say them. There was too much between us, too much still not talked about, reasonings, answers, and questions. Even more than the fight, there was the fact that I hurt everyone I loved. I’d hurt him, and I refused to do it again.

“Why would you ask me this?”

He flinched as if I’d slapped him. “Because I love you.”

Love. He said that word so effortlessly as if the last few days hadn’t happened. He loved me. I’d known that since the tunnel, yet hearing it now only twisted my gut. He loved me, and I was the worst thing for him.

“How?” My voice was nothing but a whisper.

“How can I love you?” His face drew tight.

“Yes. After everything I’ve done, everything I put you through? Especially recently?”

Samkiel looked at me in utter disbelief as if I had said the stupidest thing in the world. The ground shook once more, a rumbling I felt more than heard.

“Don’t look at me like that.” I shook my head. “I lied to you.”

Samkiel nodded. “I know.”

“I hurt you.” My voice cracked. “Like I hurt her.”

My chest split wide open, and I wondered if he could see the dark, damaged heart beneath. The one that was still bruised and bloody no matter how many words or soft smiles he tossed my way. No matter how hard he tried to fix me, I was still a broken, violent thing. I’d realized as we fought that I was never going to change. I had spent eons surviving alone, being brutal in a brutal world. He required a pure, safe love, and all I could offer was a vengeful inferno of it. Nothing soft or delicate, my love cut, but I refused to make him bleed for me any longer. That was not a healthy love. Even I knew that.

“Dianna.”

“No.” I was firm, and I meant it. I took a step back, my boots echoing on the rotten, wooden floorboards, waving my hand toward that damn ring he held on his palm. “Samkiel, I will not stick you with a horrible life as I did her. I will not hurt you as I did her. I refuse.”

Heat flared in his gaze as he took a step forward, sunlight casting a glow across his face from where it spilled in through the missing half of the building. He was sunlight, pure and radiant, but as he stepped closer to me, he drew further into the darkness. I was that darkness. It couldn’t have represented what I was trying to keep from happening better.

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