Page 19 of Courageous Demands

“I need to think about this.”

“Of course.”

Something frustrated and ugly reared up within him as he looked at her. He waved his hand helplessly at her, feeling his own eyes stinging with emotion. She always knew how to get at him, to read him like a book, and years later – it was no different.

“You have got to be sure you want this because I am never going to let you hurt me again. You said you chose yourself. Well, I’m choosing me! If you think I’m going to just fall right into your trap like some unsuspecting fly, you’d be very wrong. I don’t need you anymore,” he spat, the lie nauseatingly bitter on his tongue. “I’ve learned to get past you, and I’m not going to roll right over, belly-up when you snap your fingers. Got it?”

“You never were easy,” she whispered tearfully, her lower lip wobbling. “But I always knew you were worth it.”

Those moments from long ago flashed behind his eyes. He’d been the popular jock, and she was the quiet girl at the back of the class. He dated around and rejected others like they were nothing, but when he’d been assigned to work with her on a project – forced into talking to her – things had changed. He'd found heaven and with it came his own private hell that he’d been existing in since she left him.

“I gotta go,” he muttered again, plugging in his radio and backing away from her. “Don’t do this again.”

“Will you text or call me when you get off work?”

“I don’t know,” he said bluntly.

“Alec?” she called out as he turned away – and heaven help him – he paused, standing there with his back to her.

“Yeah?”

“How many people are on the truck? I’m serious about the cookies. Do you need four boxes or five?”

They were all tired and hungry - and nosy. The guys were going to ask what was going on. Maybe he could soften the teasing with the boxes of cookies and dang it. He still loved Samoas.

“There’s five of us,” he said begrudgingly.

“Just a moment,” she requested, moving around behind him.

He stood there waiting, almost afraid to turn around and see something that couldn’t be ‘unseen.’ He already knew he was going to be dreaming of those thin spaghetti straps on her shoulders and the way the lace came down to a ‘V’ over her bosom. Yeah, he really wasn’t ready to see if it was a teddy, a camisole, or whatever else the bottom half was.

Alec swallowed as a hand touched his shoulder, and he saw her delicate arm beside his frame. She was barely out of his sight, and he was fighting the urge to crane his neck to sneak a peek. He accepted the grocery bag stuffed full of boxes that she was holding out to him – and nodded.

“Thank you.”

“Thank you for talking with me… I hope we can do this again soon.”

“We’ll see.”

“In the words of Alec Beckett, ‘That’s not a ‘NO,’ lady’…” she teased gently, chuckling nervously. “Let’s have coffee sometime and talk once more.”

“I’ll think about it.”

“That’s all I could ask.”

“I’ve really gotta go, Willow.”

“Okay.”

Yet, he stood there unmoving. Her hand was still on his shoulder, and he hated the way that every nerve fiber within him was purring under the light sensation of pressure with his sooty coat. How could she want to be around him?

Everything with her was soft, gentle, warm, and welcoming, like a pool of warm water he just wanted to bathe in for hours. He was hardened, rugged, raw, and elemental. There was no explaining who he was, it was just there and a hard fact. They were opposites – and he was drawn to her like a magnet.

Like pulling a boot out of a tar pit he was stuck in, he managed to take a step forward and then another. It was like prying himself from her very presence and it took everything out of him. If he thought he was tired before – that was nothing compared to the exhaustion he felt now.

Physically tired… definitely.

Mentally worn out… uh, huh.

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