Page 145 of The Life-Changing Magic of Falling in Love

‘I am calm. I am positive. I’m…’

‘Do not say in love with a guy you just met.’

‘Happy, is what I was going to say. Maybe I have fallen in love. Or at least back in love with life.’

‘So, George is like a reward for you?’

‘That shouldn’t upset you if all you want for me is fun.’

‘It’s not all we want for you, Ashleigh,’ Oz says gently.

‘What happens if your reward is removed?’ Carlos asks, like a dog with a bone.

‘Or,’ I say leaning forward and adding dramatically, ‘what if George stays and we fall in love with each other? Become each other’s person? Get married? Have a family?’

Carlos is looking at me like he’s scared I really think that’s going to happen when it couldn’t possibly and it hurts. Really hurts. ‘We need you to be careful. We need you to be sensible. We don’t want to see you get hurt.’

‘Are you telling me that if I fall you won’t be here to catch me? Because if that would place too much on our friendship I’ve been through heartache before and managed to pick myself back up.’

‘That was different. If Sarah was here, she’d tell you to?—’

‘Nope.’ I stand up, yanking my purse strap over my shoulder. ‘You don’t get to talk about Sarah. You never even met her. I’ll tell you this about her though, if Sarah was here, she’d tell me she was happy for me.’ Wouldn’t she? Feeling panicky, I mutter, ‘I should be going. Thanks for the muffin.’

‘Ashleigh, wait. Please?—’

I pause at the door, my breath locked in my throat. ‘I get it. You’re looking out for me. I’m okay. See you later.’ Wrenching the door open, I step out into the morning sunshine.

I’m shaking a little bit as I walk.

Can feel that horrid, relentless, inevitable feeling of over-breathing.

I don’t know – can’t fathom – what Sarah would have thought about me and George.

It’s okay to be happy, Ashleigh.

That’s all I need for her to tell me.

I glance up.

Silence.

I immediately switch to looking down at the ground for a white feather to pick up.

There aren’t any.

Chapter Forty-Four

MIDNIGHT CALLER

Ashleigh

‘Are you all right, dear?’

I look up from the list I’ve been making and note the concerned expression on Mrs. Lundy’s face.

The short answer is I’m not sure.

You know that thing when you try to stifle a yawn by pretending your jaws are wired together and end up instead making a sort of snorting, hiccupping sound? That.

---