Page 24 of Just a Little in Love

“Agreed,” Patrick said. “Let me know what you need, anytime.”

Gabriel clicked his phone off and thought about what he’d just admitted to Patrick. Yes, he was a Dominant. Yes, Rowan was a little. But Patrick and Charlie made it work, or was that just because Patrick was strictly a daddy these days? He couldn’t narrow down or put a name to the relationship he had with Rowan. He might have spent less time at the club since his dad’s death and helping Clare to get situated, but that didn’t explain why he didn’t seem to be connecting with any of the subs.

He got up and walked back through the lounge and into the bedroom. Rowan was still in the bathroom, but it was quiet. He would bet money that Rowan was in there working himself up over what he’d told him. Well, that stopped now. Whatever they became, it started with trust.

Gabriel knocked on the door. “Can I come in?” Rowan didn’t answer, but the door cracked open a moment later.

Gabriel smiled as if there was nothing wrong with Rowan hiding in the bathroom. “Pancakes?”

Rowan gaped, but then he took a deep breath. “Withchocolatechips?” He rushed it, but the words were still discernible.

Gabriel smiled. “Are there any other kind?”

Chapter twelve

Rowan was kind of numb. He didn’t even want to think about his mom. He just wanted to be safe. To forget everything. He looked at the clothes he held in his hands and for some reason he couldn’t work out how they went together, or what to put on first. Which was crazy, but he just stared at them for what seemed like forever until a large pair of hands took them very gently from his own. He looked up at Daddy. “I can’t work them out,” he whispered. He didn’t want to. He wanted it to be someone else’s responsibility.

“Then it’s a good thing I can,” Daddy murmured. and took a second towel and made sure Rowan was dry. He even added some deodorant before he bunched up the t-shirt and pulled it over Rowan.

Rowan stared down. “Is this mine?” He didn’t remember a Buzz Lightyear shirt. He had a Woody one, but he had no idea where that was, or if it was even important to remember.

“It is now,” Daddy said, and Rowan smiled cautiously. That was good. Daddy seemed pleased. Then Daddy made sure his bottom half was dry. Rowan didn’t look there. He didn’t want to. If he thought about it, he would have admitted Daddy’s sure, gentle hands were nice, but Rowan chose not to think about it. It was safer that way.

Safer for so many reasons, and shame burned brightly in him when he thought about Master Paul.

“Rowan, come back. I lost you there, buddy.”

Rowan blinked. “I was thinking about being a puppy,” he said honestly.

Daddy helped Rowan on with his pad and some comfy fleece-lined pajama bottoms. Rowan nearly gagged in horror at what he’d just said. What on earth was wrong with him? He—

But gently and oh so carefully, Daddy hooked a finger under Rowan’s chin and lifted it until Rowan was staring into Daddy’s warm brown eyes. Then Daddy smiled and Rowan melted. “It wasn’t your fault. None of it was your fault.”

Rowan stared at Daddy, unsure. Most things were his fault. At least Mother had always… But Daddy said it wasn’t, and Rowan trusted Daddy more than Mother. “Okay,” he whispered. Daddy stood and held out his hand and, awed, Rowan slid his hand into Daddy’s grasp. His heart was doing a fluttering, beating thing, and his stomach felt like he was on a rollercoaster.

“I’ve never been on a rollercoaster,” he said without thinking, and Daddy chuckled.

“You want to know a secret?” He steered Rowan to the small kitchen table and pulled out a chair. Rowan saw the Buzz Lightyear cup with a straw, but he was too busy thinking about the secret.

“Does anyone else know?” Because wow – Daddy might be trusting Rowan with something just for him. Daddy made sure Rowan was comfortable and then walked to the oven.

“Absolutely not,” Daddy said. “They’d revoke my Dom card.”

Rowan stared at Daddy in shock. “They can do that?”

“Well,” Daddy smiled as he used a kitchen towel to wipe a frying pan, then pulled a jug of what looked like milk out of the fridge. He guessed it was for the pancake mixture with Daddy heating the pan. “They do, but not for this. I’m more likely to give it up voluntarily if anyone ever found out I’m afraid of rollercoasters.”

Rowan gaped in surprise, but then Daddy winked, and the thought of Daddy being frightened of anything suddenly made him giggle, and the sound that bubbled from his lips must have shocked them both. Rowan because he didn’t think he would laugh at anything ever again, and Daddy because…well, maybe for the same reason.

“I don’t mind log flumes, water rides,” he continued seriously. “My reason being that I can swim, but I can’t fly.” Rowan giggled again, but because this time he was sure he was allowed. Daddy looked pleased at the noise he made, and then out of the blue Rowan was imagining another sort of noise, and another sort of reason for it. And for once, it didn’t make him feel dirty. Strange, and it was bewildering almost, but not necessarily wrong.

“Rowan?” Daddy must have noticed the little hitch in his breathing. “Are you okay, sweetheart?”

And Rowan melted. Daddy had called him sweetheart. He nodded enthusiastically and Daddy poured some batter in the pan, then went to the fridge and got out a packet of chocolate chips. “So, you like them with chocolate chips?” Daddy asked. “Is that your favorite?”

Rowan sobered almost instantly. “I don’t know,” he whispered, and of course because Daddy seemed to catch every single word he said, even the ones that escaped without permission, he turned after he flipped the pancake and shook the chips on it.

“Because you have so many you like, or…”

---