Page 128 of Until I Own You

I will do everything he has ever done for me. Even if he doesn’t tell me what’s going on. I will be his comfort, his care.

I feel too deeply for him to pretend like his pain is not my own.

I won’t go as far to tell him I love him because…

That’s too scary. Too much.

However, my heart screams at me just go for it. To use the words appropriate to the situation. My brain says, “Hush, not yet.”

Seth opens his mouth so slowly that I can see each minute movement.

I wait. Do not press. Do not look with expectation.

“My dad…” he says, his voice pained and strangled. “He died here.”

My eyes widen, brows jumping. “Oh my god.”

“Not in the house,” he amends. His eyes flutter shut. He swallows. “On the ocean.”

Dad never told me about how Seth’s father passed away. I just knew it was an accident. And of course, I’ve never asked Amelia about it. I haven’t wanted to spoil her happiness.

I’ve never wanted to spoil anything. Which makes lying here with Seth…

“We were fishing. We did that a lot down here. We were way out on the ocean. Storm rolled in. Sudden. That’s how it is in Florida.” He squints his eyes. They are fixed on our clasped hands.

He worries his lips together for a few moments. “The waves became huge. Dad did all he could but eventually, the boat capsized.”

My organs start twisting in knots. I think I know where this is heading.

“We started trying to swim. Dad started losing strength, I pulled him along with me as long as I–” His voice breaks, and he presses his chin to his chest, another sob escapes.

I release Seth’s hands and pull my body to his, sliding my fingers through his hair.

I need to be close. Need to let him know I am receiving each and every word. I won’t look away.

“He told me to let him go.”

Tears threaten my eyes. I push them back. I won’t upend his moment with my own sadness.

“I didn’t want to,” Seth cries. “But if I was going to survive, I–”

“He knew that, Seth. He was trying to save you.”

Seth’s lips contort. A combination of distress and anger. “I should’ve been able to save him too, I should’ve…”

“He wanted you to live, Seth.” I’m not sure the words are even coming out of my mouth.

I’m discussing his father’s death with him, something I never thought would happen. And I never in a million years would have anticipated how truly horrible his death was.

Seth’s lower lip trembles. “But I wanted my dad,” he says. “I want my dad.”

For all his strength and posturing, Seth still has his inner child trembling inside him in need of love and attention. Just like anyone else.

I’ve never gotten a chance to glimpse it. And now that I see it, my heart is screaming at me louder to love this man.

I cradle Seth’s head to my shoulder. His arms slide around me, clinging to me. “I’m so sorry, Seth. I am so sorry you had to go through that.”

He buries his face into my neck, tries to catch his breath. His tears tickle my skin. “I thought coming here…” he says between heavy breaths. “I thought coming here with you would help me move on, but I can’t.”

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