Page 50 of The Companion Love Trap

“You know, you were very thorough when listing things about Kieran but vague about your own details.”

His shoulders tensed, and he glanced up, his eyes meeting mine, a little more guarded.

“What do you want to know, Firecracker? I’m an open book. All you gotta do is ask.”

I assessed him, knowing that wasn’t entirely true. But I wasn’t here to uncover his secrets, only to get to know him more.

“It said you like to dance. What kind?” I asked. He instantly deflated and returned to his cheerful self.

“All kinds. I was forced to take all the lessons as a kid—Latin, ballroom, tap, ballet, and contemporary. At some point, I fell in love with it and thought about pursuing it for a while. But I didn’t enjoy it as much as I thought in the end. Photography was a better fit.”

There was something hidden in what he was saying, but I couldn’t figure it out. His upbringing sounded a lot like my own.

“Same. Between music and dance, I never had a free moment growing up. Once I got past the level of being competent enough to please my mother, I was allowed to stop dancing. Music had been my first love, until it wasn’t.”

“You’re magnificent at Howlers. Why don’t you do that more?”

“That’s a bomb of a question.” I blew out a breath. “I’m not ready to answer it yet. Can you ask me another time?”

“Of course. Sorry, I didn’t know it was so complicated.”

“Complicated.” I huffed out a dry laugh. That was one word for it. “I know, you know.” I dropped my eyes. “Last night, I heard Kieran playing.” I peered up, Jace’s hazel eyes catching mine.

“So that’s what this morning was about?”

I bit my lip but nodded. Jace put his glass down and moved closer, taking my hand in his.

“Kieran’s past with music is just as complicated as yours sounds. Don’t be too hard on him for not telling you. That’s his safe place, and he loved performing with you the most. That’s how I knew you were the one to fill the ad.” His hand squeezed mine, and he blew out a breath before turning to meet me dead on.

“Kieran’s my best friend, and I love him, but there are things I don’t understand or connect with him on. Same for me with him. He gives me something I need, but it’s not everything. I knew a while back our answer would be to find the right woman to balance us both out. I know I joked at first about us sharing, but that’s how we are. This isn’t just a fling, baby. I believe you’re the balance to our teeter-totter, Everly.”

The blood pounded in my ears, the sound of the water the only other thing I could hear as I tried not to pass out from the sheer amount of fear I felt at his words.

“That’s a lot of pressure,” I whispered, dropping my eyes. “I understand why he didn’t tell me. I’m not even mad about him keeping it to himself. We’re all entitled to our secrets, and we’ve only just started to get to know one another. If anything, it scared me because my one barrier to giving in to Cruz was knowing that Phantom owned a piece of my heart. And now…” I trailed off, too scared to admit the rest. I picked at something on the blanket, my body needing to move or I’d throw up.

Jace’s hand cupped my cheek and lifted my face up to where I could no longer hide.

“And now nothing is stopping you from giving in. For letting yourself fall in love and be loved. For trusting others and caring about them as much as yourself.”

I sucked in a breath. Jace wasn’t playing around. Tears formed in my eyes, and I wanted to be angry at him. How did he see me so clearly? I didn’t even see myself that well, but he did.

Jace saw me.

“I know I’ve been the architect behind everything, but it doesn’t mean I’m not scared, Firecracker. We just confront those fears differently.” He gave me a sheepish look, his one shoulder shrugging as his cheeks pinked.

“What do you mean?” I asked, unsure of what he was saying. Jace was so sure of everything.

“I hide my fear by being so confident that no one questions it. You hide yours by being so independent you don’t have to rely on others. We’re both so scared of being hurt that we hurt ourselves first.”

Fuck. He was right.

Hadn’t I just realized that, too? Pushing people away was exhausting. All the walls, rules, and emotional condoms I had to keep me from feeling weren’t working, and I was only hurting myself by trying to prove I didn’t need anyone.

I slept in a dog kennel, for fuck’s sake, just to avoid asking someone to let me crash!

There’s independence and just being plain stubborn. Time to evacuate your stubborn era, girl. It’s not a good look.

I cleared my throat and took a deep breath. Jace’s eyes were soft as he watched me drop all the unnecessary barriers and lay myself bare. Even though I was emotionally naked, I felt lighter than I had in years.

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