Page 71 of Camera Shy

“Are you…” Palmer trails off, lost for words. “So you like him?”

I sip my coffee, smiling to myself as I enjoy the last few seconds where my secret is still in the bag. “I had sex with him.”

“What?!” Palmer squalls. “Stop it! Why didn’t you call me?”

I have to remove the phone from my ear she’s shrieking so loud.

“I did…” I unsubtly clear my throat into the phone.

“Well, if you had led with that, I might’ve called you back sooner.”

Wow. Her lack of filter from her brain to her mouth…I swear. “Good to know you only want to talk when I’m entertaining.”

“Aves,” she groans, “come on. I mean, I would’ve called to make sure you are okay. I know you don’t take sex lightly. I can’t believe you rebounded with a guy like that. I mean, hell, he’s so fine. If I was there. I sure as hell would’ve taken my shot.”

My annoyance immediately bubbles back up. Back off. Back the fuck off. Uh-oh. Jealousy is not good. Jealousy is the enemy of casual sex. Finn is my teacher. My coach. My friend. He’s a whole lot of things that I shouldn’t be acting jealous over.

I overcompensate my casual reply, trying to calm my jittery heart. “Funny. I don’t think we’ve ever shared a guy. First time for everything, I suppose.”

“Oh, stop. I wouldn’t… Um, so how are you? How do you feel? Does Mason know?”

“Why would Mason know?” I set my coffee mug down on a coaster and tuck my knees to my chest before pulling the throw up to my chin. Why is it so cold in here? I remind myself to check the thermometers in the tanks. Dex’s air conditioning is always running now that the Vegas summer heat is picking up. I wonder if Cherry feels like she’s swimming in the artic. She seems a little slower lately.

“I don’t know, if I were you, I’d call him and shove your new boy toy right down his throat. It sends a clear message.”

“What message?”

“That you guys are over. Done. No going back. You’ve moved on.”

Palmer missed the whole Rumble chat fiasco, so there’s no need to defend how Mason didn’t cheat on me after all. But again, the more Palmer tells me what I have to do with my love life, the more I want to do the opposite—just to prove a point. Talk about regressing. There’s obviously still a rebellious teenager that lives inside me.

“Finn and I are friends. That’s it. There’s nothing to shove down Mason’s throat. I’m spending the summer trying to figure out how to love myself. Once I figure that out, I can decide how I feel about this breakup. I’ve seen couples come through worse, you know? I’ve also seen couples walk away for less. I don’t know what to think. The bottom line is Mason said he was unhappy and we broke up. He didn’t hit me, cheat on me, or lie to me… he was just unhappy. Should I hate him for telling the truth? Plus, he told me he may have just needed space. Maybe I needed space too. What if this is what we needed to wake ourselves up?”

“He said that? He actually said he wants to get back together?” She literally sounds disgusted. What the hell is this hypocrisy? Palmer’s had endless boyfriends who have cheated on her. Her relationships are usually short-lived, but she’s run back to them before. She only saves this fuck him, he doesn’t deserve you energy for me, apparently. Or maybe she wants Mason out of the way. I’m not sure.

“He said maybe this is a break. You know, my parents took a break for a while and got back together.”

“Right…shortly before their divorce. Remember how hard you took it? Do you honestly want to do that to your kids too?”

Jesus, Palmer. Her sharp mouth. “Regardless of how things pan out, Mason and I still have a business to run. We have a huge contract at stake. A career-making contract that we have to secure, together. Right now, I need support. Not demands.”

“I agree. When it comes to business, he should be supportive—”

“No. Palmer, from you. I need support from you. Don’t tell me what to do. Just listen.”

How long am I going to have to coach her on how to be a good friend? It’s been two decades. Don’t you know me by now? Can’t you understand what I need?

She mumbles something under her breath before she says, “Okay, fine. I support you. I’m listening.”

“Thank you.” The heavy silence settles between us, and as much as I want to dish about Finn and how he’s turning my world upside down, instead, I decide to keep my treasured secrets to myself this time. “I’m going to get my day started, but good luck on set. Break a leg.”

“Thanks. Oh, and, Aves?”

“Yeah?”

“I know I say the wrong thing sometimes, but you know that I, um…you’re my best friend…the only person who ever believed in me and stood by me and uh…I’m just sorry that I’m the weak link in this friendship. I really do love you in my way. I wish I were better…more like you.”

“Palmer,” I say amidst a heavy sigh.

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