Page 33 of Camera Shy

“It’s been way more than five minutes, and I can’t go any further without getting carried away. So…I should go.”

He’s not technically rejecting me. I didn’t offer. But shame rears its ugly head anyway, and the confident woman from two minutes before exits the stage. We’re back to the same ol’ Avery. Unsure…embarrassed…scared.

“Okay, I understand,” I say, crossing my arms over my bare chest, covering my nakedness as best as I can. “Good night then.”

He takes a few steps toward the closet entry. He stops, then spins around. “Hey, I have a long run planned for tomorrow morning. Eight miles at least.”

“Uh, okay,” I sass. This man is fucking crazy if he’s inviting me to run eight miles with him. “Have a good run.”

His shoulders shake as he laughs, understanding my sentiment. “What I mean is I’ll probably need the hot tub after. Say around eight?” He points to me. “This is either your warning to avoid me or your invitation to join me. Whatever you choose. Good night, Avery.”

With that, he’s gone.

He leaves me with a clear choice.

Did I like what just happened? Or is this man who is way out of my league and much too tempting, a dangerous choice in my life right now? Finn has unrequited love written all over him, and I’d be an idiot to let myself go there. But then again…

The way he was just looking at me in the mirror…

The way he made me feel about myself…

I think I’m standing at least an inch taller at the moment. I’ve never met a man in my life who treats a woman that way. Finn has the answers to a lot of questions on my mind. Questions I only have one summer to answer before reality punches back.

So it’s easy to make my choice.

I need to buy a swimsuit.

9

Finn

Her eyes.

The lukewarm water from the showerhead cascades over my shoulders, runs down my back, and splashes at my feet.

Those fucking eyes.

I shut my lids and see Avery’s eyes engrained in my mind. They were so light in front of the mirror, underneath the bright closet lights. They were the prettiest shade of seafoam green, with a hint of fire right when she told me to take her panties off.

I should’ve.

What stopped me?

The dickhead she wanted to marry who cheated on her, then dumped her instead. That’s who. He even had the nerve to blame her sex appeal. Avery is now the most emotionally fragile woman in the world. What’s gratuitous sex going to do except confuse the shit out of her? She doesn’t need to spiral like I did after Nora and I broke up. Hooking up left me feeling so much worse and constantly nervous that I’d contracted an STD or accidentally gotten a one-night stand pregnant. Add anxiety to heartbreak and what do you get?

A fucking hot mess.

Avery’s better than that. It’s probably why I like her. I like her company. I really like her tits. I really, really like that she’s the only woman outside of Lennox who doesn’t see me as something to use or possess. It’s obvious from how comfortable she is around me that she thinks I’d never be interested in her. She’s wrong, of course. But she’s comfortable, which means the conversation flows. Maybe I’m an ass for doing this, but Avery is my little experiment in building trust with women again and relearning how to let my guard down.

How many conversations do I need with her to really get over Nora? Let’s find out.

Still, though…

Those goddamn beautiful eyes.

The more pornographic part of my brain is envisioning her looking up at me from her knees, my tip in her mouth as she smiles between sucking. In my fantasy, Avery’s taking her time sucking me off because she’s already thoroughly sated. I’ve taken care of her three times. Once with my fingers, then with my tongue, last with my cock.

I fist my erection in the shower, hard, as if I could stop it from growing.

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