Page 137 of Camera Shy

36

Finn

The morning after Cass’s party, I walk into my kitchen to see Lennox making coffee. She’s in baggy sweatpants, with no makeup.

I yank on the shirt I’m holding and let my groggy eyes catch up with me. I had a hard time falling asleep. I called Avery about ten times before her phone either died or she shut it off. It took all my self-control not to go banging her door down. I’m still not sure if I made the right decision. Doesn’t a woman want a man willing to move mountains for her? Or is that controlling? Fuck. My favorite thing about Avery is that we can talk, and now, after one stupid party, I’m second-guessing everything I say.

“Lennox, why are you here when you’re sick? Oh, shit. Did I forget about an appointment?” It’s Sunday… I never book clients on Sundays.

“No,” she says, grabbing the cream from the fridge. “No clients today.”

“Then why are you here spreading germs in my kitchen, instead of resting in bed? I could’ve dropped off food today.”

“I’m fever-free, Finny. I’m just still tired. But I needed to get out of the house today. How was the party? Is Avery still sleeping?” She nods down the hall toward the bedroom.

“She’s not here,” I mutter. I stare at the coffee pot dripping, letting the look of pain on Avery’s face last night flash through my mind.

“Did something happen?” Lennox asks, leaning back against the counter and studying my face.

“Last night was a dumpster fire floating down shit’s creek. That’s the only way I can describe it.”

“You and Avery fought?” she asks, raising her eyebrows, clearly accusing me. I shake my head.

“Not really.”

“Jesus, Finn. Save the dramatic build-up, please. What happened?”

I breathe out and shrug. “Let’s see… I went down on Avery in the limo, then Morgan bought her a drink and tried to tell her I’m cheating on her with Nora, so I clocked him, and I would’ve done much worse, but Avery ran off scared right into the champagne room with Cass. I caught them making out and everything was fine until I joined in, but the minute I touched Cass, Avery must’ve come to her senses and ran out of the room crying, ditched me at the club, and now she won’t take my calls. So…yeah. Dumpster fire.”

Lennox is gawking at me.

Yup. Just let all that soak in.

“I miss one party,” she mumbles. “And I really didn’t need to know about the limo part.”

“I realize. I just wanted to mention it because it was the only enjoyable part of the evening,” I snark.

The coffee maker beeps and I proceed to fill a cup. I don’t bother with cream and sugar. I let the hot brew burn my tongue.

“So Avery is sexually curious—”

“No, I think Avery is confused because of her ex. And it’s my fault.”

“I’m going to get some coffee, and then I need you to be a little less cryptic.” Lennox silently fills a cup, douses it with my oat milk creamer, and takes an exaggerated sip. “Ah, much better. Now, explain.”

“Remember the thing you used to tell me about Nora? The tire patch thing?”

Lennox tolerated Nora for years, for me. But she always warned me that we wouldn’t work out because I was patching a tire instead of replacing it.

Nora had so much damage from her prior relationship, that she probably needed therapy. She needed to move to a new city and get away from Morgan entirely. A real fresh start. Instead, for a long time, I just did my best to patch all the tiny holes in her heart, thinking if I worked hard enough, I could save her. But at the end of the day, I was patching the tire Morgan punctured over and over again. We should’ve started fresh, but she just couldn’t do that with me. It was too messy. Too many lines were blurred. We never stood a chance.

“What if I’m doing the same thing with Avery?” I ask.

She cocks her head to the side. “I didn’t get the impression that Avery’s in love with her ex.”

I shake my head. “Me neither, but she’s loyal to him. She’s not willing to walk away from the business. Maybe I shouldn’t push her to pick me. That’s exactly what I did with Nora.”

“How can you compare them? Avery’s nothing like Nora.”