Page 27 of Mister Mom

“So you can reap the benefits of my hard work? Hell, no. I’ll be the one handing out my phone number to the ladies.”

“Pfft,” Leo says. “A kid has nothing on a dog, man. You should see all the flirting that happens when I take Cooper to the dog park.”

We all laugh because we’ve all seen how his dog acts like a pussy magnet.

“It’s just the boy? How old is he?” Leo asks. Forget the doggy spa and clothing line he owns—this guy should be on 60 Minutes interviewing people.

“He’s four. Layla has a daughter, too, but she’s still really young, so she’ll be in daycare.” I take a sip of my beer, staring out into the ocean and letting the hypnotic vision of the waves rolling into shore over and over again relax me a bit.

I was on my way to join these guys when I got Layla’s text this morning. I should’ve gone surfing instead of meeting her. It would have given her extra time to find a nanny.

“She has two kids? Isn’t she like seventeen?” Leo’s face distorts and I laugh at his lack of knowledge of the biz. The man spends most of his time sewing clothes for dogs.

“She’s twenty-eight.”

“Really?” His eyes bug out. “I guess I can’t picture her as anything other than the little sister on that show she was on.”

I nod and so does Jagger.

“Growing Up Baxter, right?” He snaps his fingers and points to me. “That’s it. She still as hot as she was back then?”

“She’s fucking gorgeous,” Jagger says before I can answer and for some reason his response bothers me. “She was married to Carver Sterling.”

“She was married to her brother?” The distaste on his face is clear.

Leave it to Leo.

“They’re actors,” I remind him.

He tilts his head and gives me the ‘no shit’ face. “They still played brother and sister for years. That’s gross.”

“You do know…” Jagger looks up at me and shakes his head. “Never mind.”

“So you think she’s gorgeous?” Leo throws his balled-up napkin on the plate and pushes it away from him.

“Jagger said that.” I point to Jagger, but both their gazes land on me. “Jagger thinks the fifty-year-old librarian down the street is hot,” I say with a laugh.

“She’s a total MILF, dude,” Jagger says. “Get your head out of your dog’s ass for once and you might notice shit like that.”

Leo rolls his eyes at Jagger and turns his attention to me. “So? Is she pretty?” He says ‘pretty’ with a childish tone and bats his eyes for emphasis.

“Yeah, she’s pretty.”

Jagger smiles and Leo leans forward on the table.

“You like her?” he asks.

I shrug. “She seems nice. Lives one crazy-ass life. Two kids, a soon-to-be ex-husband who doesn’t give a shit. I kinda feel bad for her.”

That’s the truth. It was impossible not to notice the bags under her eyes no matter the amount of cover-up she’d put on, or the fact that her eyes were bloodshot and her movements all had a worn-out quality to them. She’s permanently tired and half the reason I agreed to help her was to give the woman a break. I need her to be her best for my film.

“Uh-huh.” Leo purses his lips, nodding his head. “You like her.”

I throw my napkin at him, hitting him square on the forehead. “This isn’t junior high.”

My two friends look at one another. “He likes her,” they say in unison.

“I’m out of here.” I stand and tuck my chair back in.