Page 106 of Knight

He tries to steady me but I push him back, his words hitting me like a giant bag of dicks and again, my hand goes flying. I want him to hurt as much as he’s making me hurt. I want him to feel the pain but he catches my hand, pulling me in close. “Get the fuck out of here, Medusa, before you embarrass yourself.”

“Too late!” Georgina’s voice comes from the crowd. She steps forward in a dress that looks like a toga, her phone pointed at us. But she’s not the only one with her phone out. The entire party is getting this altercation on video, and as usual, I’m the goddamn star. Well, a very drunk version of me anyway. “It’ll be easy to commit this pathetic display to memory. Say hi to QuickTok.”

I lunge at her, but Damien stops me and I hate him even more. He’ll always take after them. He always does. “I mean it, Rowland,” he growls in my ear, holding me from smashing Georgina’s face in, my back to his chest. “I’m getting you a ride.”

Fighting out of his grip, I almost topple again when I get loose. “It’s fine!” I walk, nope, stumble towards the end of the hall. There’s another staircase back here and it’ll save me from walking through the hoard of gawkers at the front of the party. That’s when I see the staircase for the roof.

Jasper flashes in my mind, the way he had my sister with his grimy hands all over her. I hold onto the wall before I start climbing the steps hardly thinking this through. When I push open the door to the roof, I spot Willow right away. She’s there with Bella and Jordan, drinking coolers as they lean over the railing. Their heads whip towards me when the door makes a BANG!

“Jo?” WIllow’s shoulders drop when she sees me, leaning back from the rail. She doesn’t look surprised and when I see the phone in her hand, I know why. “I can’t believe you followed me! You’re so drunk right now!”

“Believe it!” I yell but goddamn, it’s still a slur. “L-let’s go. I’m calling Uber.”

“I’m not going anywhere,” Willow confirms. Jordan and Bella on either side of her like she’s starring in a film with her squad by her side. It reminds me of Allie and Nate, more relationships I brought to the ground.

“Yes, you are!” I reach for her, surprised at my brute force when I grab her soft arm. She snatches it away and my hold slips. And fuck, I’m going down with it.

“Ew,” Bella’s voice is an extra added insult to injury when I hit the floor. “This is woeful. I’m so sorry she’s your sister, Low. Please tell me you’re staying.”

“I’m not going anywhere with her!” she yells, the smell of cherry vodka coming off her breath. “Go home, Jo! You’re not the boss of me anymore and no one wants you here.” Her words cut like fucking glass.

“N-not even you?” The question slips out as I look up at her, a cold curl falling in front of my eye. I’m starting to feel more pathetic by the minute.

She turns around, putting the bottle on the ground before blinking at me on her way to the door. Her expression softens, shoulders dropping with it. “Just … go home.” I glance at Jordan and he looks away. Bella gives me a look like I’m a lost puppy before they exit through the door.

The door clicks shut and I’m left out on the cold rooftop. Alone.

Thanks to the alcohol, I’m too drunk for the winter’s night air to make me too cold. Picking up the bottle, I walk to where they stood, taking a long, burning swig. I’m not sure where the bottle I came with went so this will have to do.

No one wants you here.

Her words make me flinch when they replay in my head. She’s my little sister and she doesn’t even need me. Leaning over the rail, I take another swig, the cold air on my face, the grass blurring below. Blending cherry vodka with bourbon isn’t exactly a great mix but right now I need anything that’ll dull the pain.

Anything that’ll make me feel free.

A tear falls from my eye before I even realize I’m crying, and I watch as it disappears into the air, making its way to the floor.

I want to disappear like that tear.

Like my parents.

Like Sebastien.

They don’t have to deal with this shit anymore. They don’t have to deal with the pain, the hurt, the disappointment.

I want to be free.

Taking another swig, I look over the railing as it begins to snow. I do my best to climb on the ledge, but I’m wobbly, my legs betraying my mind when I try to level out.

“Is that Jo?” Someone calls from the front yard but I can’t see them. I’m staring up at the stars, my mind slipping to my parents. The lump in my throat grows. I wonder what my parents saw that night. Before their lives burned away forever. After taking another swig of vodka, I let the bottle hang between my fingers but it slips.

“Fuck,” I mutter as it hits the railing, toppling over to the ground below.

SMASH!

The sound is distant as I swallow on the vile spit in my mouth, realizing how far it’s gone. It’s a long way down. But it’s short. One short fall to freedom.

Willow’s good now.

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