Page 46 of Stargazer

I peered up at him curiously, watching the way his jaw moved as he spoke and his eyes glowed amber in the light.

He continued, “But the fact that your mum didn’t tell you, I assumed there was a purpose to her silence. Assumed and hoped she didn’t want you to be part of that life, for whatever reason. And I was so relieved that it wouldn’t be an issue for us. I thought we’d lucked out. And even though it occasionally crossed my mind, I never saw you as anything other than Vee. My Vee.”

His fingers paused the idle patterns they were tracing along my arm so he could look down at me, meeting my gaze. “It just wasn’t my place to tell you. I didn’t want to drive that wedge between you and your family. I knew it needed to come from your mum, but simultaneously hoped that if it hadn’t already come out, then maybe, just maybe, it wouldn’t have to be something we dealt with. Eventually, you won dad over too. Not that he ever didn’t like you, he was just … cautious. But he vouched for you as well, to anyone that may have questioned it.”

“To the elders? Like Tanner?” I cut in, remembering my earlier assumptions.

River’s face visibly strained but he answered immediately. “Yes, like Tanner. Being an elder who’d had various run ins with the Knights, he was worried.”

“I don’t blame him,” I offered.

“I think he’ll always be slightly more hesitant, but like everyone else, he saw you put the pack first. Saw you by my side, hosting the bonfires and looking after us. Being an honorary member.” He smiled warmly and then added, “When my dad died and I became Alpha, I made sure the pack was even more well behaved. So there was no reason your mum would look at us, and if she did sense it, she would hopefully have no reason to act. I’d never heard of the Knights acting without cause, so even if you did decide to tell her, I hoped there would be no need for us to fear. But I meant what I said about not knowing you were a wolf the night you came back; I had no idea that any Knight would be involved with a shifter.” His lips tilted into a grin. “I knew I trusted your mum for a reason.”

I returned his grin but then found myself saying, “Do you think part of you kept the pack business a secret from me because of my last name?”

It had to be asked … for my own sanity. It was okay if he said yes. I wouldn’t hold it against him.

“No.”

Once again, he didn’t hesitate.

“I wasn’t lying when I said I didn’t tell you about specific details because I was trying to keep you safe. That was always my goal. I wanted to protect you from the stress and burden that you feel now.” He looked down at me.

“However,” my heart dropped ever so slightly at the word, “there was part of me that didn’t want to be responsible for you hearing about the Knights for the first time because of everything that was going on. Which is why I probably progressively got more secretive as the threat of that increased. I was trying to protect you—and your mum, I guess—from that as well. In doing so, I lied to you. I don’t deny that’s what I did. It was easier to just keep you out of it. And because you didn’t know who you were, in my mind I was keeping you safe from the rogues and the threat they posed by continuing to keep you in the dark.”

It made sense. All of it made sense, and I told him as much.

“I’m sure after everything that happened, Tanner’s probably withdrawn the idea that I’m trustworthy,” I thought out loud, mulling it over.

“He might have his reservations, but I think he’s more concerned by our larger issues.” He looked at me. “And you came back. You’re working with us now. Just like I hoped you would if you ever became a Knight.”

He played with a strand of my hair, the gesture almost second nature to him after years of doing it and the smile that graced his lips was pleased and pure.

“And the rest of the pack? They all knew?”

“They all knew and trusted you. You grew up with us. They knew who you really were but were warned never to bring it up. I couldn’t have them being the ones to break it to you. Eventually, they stopped seeing you as a Knight. You were just our Vee.” He pushed some flyaway strands of his hair out of his face, the movement so very River that I had to intently watch it, committing it to memory once again.

“Thank you for telling me all that, Riv.”

“Of course, Angel.” His eyes were bright with happiness. “Thank you for giving me another chance.”

He grabbed my hand again and our eyes locked.

“I didn’t fight for you then, but I’ll fight for you now,” he declared.

The words were beautiful. What every girl wanted to hear.

But having two boys fighting for you …

I couldn’t help but think it would be easier if one of them chose not to.

CHAPTER 16

KITANA

Iwas going to kill him.

Carter had just finished pleasuring me with that magical mouth of his and yet that was the first thought that came to mind after experiencing an out-of-body orgasm—I kept the boy around for a reason, he was good for something.

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