Page 45 of Stargazer

The corners of his mouth tugged down. But there was resigned acceptance there.

“I know. And it’s okay. The person you’ve become is pretty awesome.” With that, his expression lifted, a dimple showing in that light-hearted smile. “Not that you weren’t awesome before. But I can see the strength flowing out of you now—like it’s a tangible thing. I see the purpose that you’ve found, and as much as I hate and regret everything that went wrong between us, it was all worth it to see you like this.” He held my hand, his thumb gently brushing against my skin. “Even if you still hated me now, it would be worth it … although, I really hope you don’t.” A slither of uncertainty flashed across his face.

“Of course not,” I reassured, holding his gaze so he saw the truth there.

He visibly calmed again. But I knew it wouldn't last for long.

There was something else that was still on my mind. A lingering thought that I equally needed addressed but was too scared to hear the answer to.

I was almost too tired to even voice it, after all the apologising and opening up of old wounds that I’d already been doing the last few days.

But I needed to.

We’d kept things surface-level up until now, fostering the mending of our relationship. Things were delicate between us. But we were diving deeper now. This was the only possible way we could grow.

“Riv?”

“Yes, Vee?” He responded immediately.

When I stalled, biting my lip, he pushed. “What is it? Ask me anything.” I heard the plea in his voice.

“Did you know I was a Knight?”

He stilled. A stillness that could only come from someone that was supernatural. A stillness that could only mean one thing.

Then he nodded.

“Yes.” The word was nothing but a whisper. “I knew.”

I loosed a breath. Long and heavy. I knew the answer I’d get. Knew Griffin would be right about the Alpha of a pack knowing who a Stone woman was.

I needed to give him a chance to explain. Since I didn’t offer him that courtesy the last time.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“When I met you, that small, nervous girl that didn’t know where to sit or where to go at lunch on her first day, I didn’t think twice about who you were. Why would I? I knew hunters existed, even from that age we were always warned. My dad always cautioned us to be careful and not share our secret. We were not to tell a soul, other than the pack kids that we grew up with. The Knights were a bedtime story used to get us to behave. But I wasn’t looking at other kids and wondering if they were part of these notorious people of wolf legend at that age. I just saw a girl that needed a friend. And I wanted to be that friend. After a while, when he’d become aware of it, my dad had told me the Knights had settled in Saint Claire. Told me, once again, as a cautionary tale. He didn’t bother asking who my friends were, he knew the pack kids stuck together. And he trusted the warnings to do their job in deterring us from speaking about our secret to outsiders.”

Sitting up and facing him, I was holding my breath, desperate to hear this side of our story.

And I saw our childhood in a whole other light. Turned out I had been in the dark about so much my entire life.

As he continued, I clung to every word, needing to hear it. To absorb it. “By the time I knew that the Stone name—your name—was one of the original hunters, you were already my best friend. I knew you. Knew you wouldn’t hurt a fly, let alone me. You weren’t like the stories my dad told. Plus, by then, it was far too late for me. We were already infatuated with each other.” He gave me a small, lovable grin that softened me, allowing me to relax at the admission that his feelings for me were always real and true.

“I had the biggest crush on you and there was no pulling me away. At that point, my plan was to keep you from dad for as long as possible.” He chuckled a little to himself at the admission. “If I’d known your father had been a wolf, things might have gone down differently,” he winked at me. “It wouldn’t have been as hard to convince my dad that you were different, and I probably wouldn’t have had to hide you from him for as long as I did.”

My ancestry was something I had excitedly told River the night of our reunion—eager to share that part of myself with him, and he’d been utterly surprised and thrilled at the fact that I was half wolf. It was the one thing that had always separated us. He’d joked that it made complete sense he’d been immediately drawn to me.

I didn’t bother asking further questions that may have caused us to spiral that night, basking in our time together instead. In the happier stuff.

“When he did find out you were a Stone, when he saw you, saw your resemblance to your mother—who he’d been keeping tabs on—he warned me to stay away. But by then all the pack kids already knew and loved you too. They vouched for you, as did I. You were probably fourteen or fifteen. And I didn’t care what my dad said, I knew you were different. I knew I could trust you. So when I fed you small details of who I was, risked it and proved that you would keep our secret, I knew you’d be on our side. No matter what happened, I knew we could count on you. You loved me enough to want to protect us. That’s just who you were. Who you are, Vee.”

He touched his palm to my cheek again, rubbing it lovingly with his thumb as he looked into my eyes and continued to tell me who I was.

“You’re sweet and caring and considerate. Always worried about other people. Always supporting the underdog. Always empathetic and putting yourself in other people’s shoes. You give people the benefit of the doubt. I proved it to my dad, too. To say he wasn’t happy at the start was an understatement. I got patrol duty for months as punishment.” His eyes momentarily crinkled in amusement, but they dulled quickly as he added, “I don’t even want to think about what would have happened if I was wrong and somehow my actions put the pack in danger. But thank the moon I wasn’t.”

Dropping my face, he put his arm around my shoulder and pulled me back against the tree, tucking me under his arm so I was comfortable for the rest of the story. I relaxed into him, listening and imagining it all unfold. My eyes were glassy as all the emotions filtered through, wave after wave, the same way I knew he was also experiencing them as he re-lived the memories now.

“Our pack was always careful anyway and we never did anything to capture the attention of the Knights. So I assumed we’d be fine. Took a gamble, I guess. I knew you didn’t know—about your birthright. Knew that if you did, you’d tell me. Confide in me like I had in you. And I assumed that if the time came and you were called to follow that path, if your mum told you and you were forced to train and learn the ways of the Knights, that you’d do so with us in mind. Be an ally and a friend. That we’d deal with it together and make it work. I knew how much you loved the pack, and I desperately hoped it would be enough.”

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