Page 54 of Puck & Her Blades

“I can’t purr,” Cygnus burst out. His eyes were anguished, and he was shaking. He didn’t look away, even though it appeared to be killing him. “I’m not allowed to talk about this. Dad will beat the hell out of me, if he finds out that I told you. Please, promise me…”

“I won’t tell, I swear.”

I let go of his hair to wrap him in my arms.

His breathing was too fast like he was close to tipping into panic attack.

He couldn’t purr? What did that mean?

Hell, I couldn’t either. I didn’t think.

“I’ve been forbidden to tell anyone this.” He was shivering. “Because if anyone finds out, then I can be marked as a Rej. And that’s the truth — the real truth that I’ve been hiding — I shouldn’t be treasured, cherished, or loved by elite Alphas. I’ve been a Rej since I was a kid, and I’m a criminal because I’m hiding it. It’s illegal not to immediately register it through a doctor with the database. When I fell into the lake and was ill with fever afterward, it physically damaged something. Then I discovered that I couldn’t purr.”

My heart hurt for Cygnus.

Fuck, was that why he’d first been sent to the Omega Cottage? Why his dad didn’t allow him friends, isolating him here on the Blade Estate, apart from during important matches?

But then, what exactly happened that day at the lake? What’s the dark mystery?

“Do you hate me now?” Cygnus’ voice was very small. “Do you want to truly reject me?”

“What? Fuck no.” I twisted Cygnus to face me. I thumbed away a tear that had chased down his soft cheek. “You haven’t treated me any differently because of my status. I can’t imagine what it’s been like for you. I’ve been hiding my own identity too, so I get it. We all do what we have to in order to survive. Your dad is a knothead.”

“He thinks that he’s protecting me. Or protecting his brand and team’s legacy, I don’t know. I’ve had this secret hanging over my head my entire life.”

“Do Jackson and Zev know?”

He nodded. “Dad only needs to threaten to reveal this truth, and they immediately have to obey him. I hate that I’m used as the stick to beat them with. Don’t you think that they’re desperate to protect me? It kills them that we’re kept apart from each other at nights. But Dad let us fall in love, so that he could control all of us, and his plan works.”

How the hell were any of us going to get free without Cygnus being marked as a Rej?

I tightened my hold on him. “Then it’s even more important that you don’t take risks. In fact, that we all don’t.”

“You’re wrong,” Cygnus replied. “I told you, I’ve lived like this my entire life. You coming here has felt like for the first time I may have the same bravery to fly as you do. Let me help you — let me actually do something that isn’t controlled by my dad — and become my own man. I don’t want to live a lie to myself. Fuck it, let me rebel.”

Now, I stand in the New York Coyotes’ UBS arena by the glass with Cygnus, staring out at the players on the ice.

I understand so much more about the Blades and how they’re controlled by their coach.

Play hasn’t started yet, but as if he knows that I’m watching, Asher skates toward me.

It’s exhilarating to watch him.

In his hockey uniform and clutching his stick, he skates faster than I thought it was possible with an intense physicality.

I love the way that he plays hockey, it’s unpredictable and hard hitting.

It makes me want to skate with him, even if I’d end up being hit across the ice as a furry puck.

I’ve watched hockey all my life, and Asher plays at a higher level than anyone else.

He’s like a god.

When Asher skates to an abrupt stop, I tilt my head in surprise. Then he pulls off his helmet, and my heart swoops.

Asher looks like a god as well.

One with dimples.

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